Some people think that it is an individual responsibilty to take care of an environment but others think it is government's job to do so. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.

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In
this
concurrent era,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
always debatable has now
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
controversial in recent times. Some folk believe that
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
government has
super power
Correct your spelling
superpower
show examples
so it is their
responsbilility
Correct your spelling
responsibility
to take care of an
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
issue
while
others reject
this
notion. In
this
essay, I will elaborate
both
Change preposition
on both
show examples
beneficial
Correct article usage
the beneficial
show examples
and adverse
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
of
this
trend and
thus
lead to a logical conclusion. First of all, air pollution is the main culprit for the entire
globe
Change noun form
globe's
show examples
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
problem
due to
increasing
Add an article
the increasing
an increasing
show examples
number of vehicles,
bursting
Correct word choice
and bursting
show examples
crackers in the events causing an issue.
In addition
,
people
cutting
Wrong verb form
cut
show examples
down
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tree in the forest for their own
benefits
Fix the agreement mistake
benefit
show examples
which
affecting
Wrong verb form
affects
show examples
habitats
Correct article usage
the habitats
show examples
of animals.
As a result
, reducing of
animals
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animal
show examples
spieces
Correct your spelling
species
.
Hence
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
apparent why many
people
are supporting
this
trend.
On the other hand
,
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
has some power and resources to implement strict
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
show examples
to prevent
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
issues.
For instance
,
due to
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
number of vehicles, government should educate
people
about air pollution and
movitate
Correct your spelling
motivate
them to use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public transport
along with
bring
Wrong verb form
bringing
show examples
to strict
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
show examples
to own two cars in each
resisdent
Correct your spelling
residence
which
minimial
Correct your spelling
minimises
Correct article usage
the usuage
show examples
usuage
Correct your spelling
usage
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
private vehicles.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
,
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
governments
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
immediate action against
people
who are cutting down
Add an article
a tree
show examples
tree
Fix the agreement mistake
trees
show examples
without any permission. In conclusion,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
and
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
both cooperate
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
each
problem
to
trackle
Correct your spelling
tackle
this
problem
. Without each other support, can't able to solve the
problem
effectively.
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the topic and sets the stage for the discussion. However, try to focus and clarify the main points you plan to discuss for better clarity.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, work on linking sentences and paragraphs smoothly. Transitional phrases can help guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
Provide more concrete examples to support your arguments. This can help strengthen your task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repeating similar ideas or phrases, and consider varying your sentence structure for greater fluency.
coherence cohesion
You have successfully included an introduction and a conclusion, structuring your essay well overall.
task achievement
You have addressed both opinions, showing an understanding of the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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