Some people think that students who achieve the best academic results should be rewarded. Others believe it is more important to reward students who show improvement. Discuss both views and give your opinion

It is often argued that there must be a reward for those
students
who show the highest results in their studies,
while
others think that it is more essential to benefit those who made an improvement.
This
essay will discuss both views and state an opinion that
students
with the highest achievements should be rewarded, followed by a conclusion. Many support the view that
high-achievers
Correct your spelling
high achievers
show examples
have to be rewarded in the first place. They think that
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
proper recognition will allow them to feel more motivated, which will inevitably encourage them to achieve even greater and more outstanding, A+ results. It is
therefore
agreed that top
students
must be recognized and see that they are being valued.
For example
, there is a significant difference in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
stipend between C, B and A
students
in many educational institutions in Russia,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
fact
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which incentivizes them to apply themselves more.
However
, many believe that it is essential to prioritize and incentivize mediocre
students
who made an improvement throughout a semester or a year, rather than top ones. They think that it is more important to support
lower grade
Add a hyphen
lower-grade
show examples
students
to keep them motivated, by giving
more
Correct pronoun usage
them more
show examples
chances and taking into account that not everyone can or
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
to be
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the top of a class.
This
essay disagrees with
this
view since in
this
case it will most likely have a negative impact on the most advanced, top-grade
students
, which will eventually cause a lack of motivation and following setbacks.
To sum up
, it may be appropriate to say that mediocre
students
should be more focused on and rewarded, it is though more important to support and give
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
recognition to top
students
.
Submitted by mihailkryukov55 on

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task achievement
Ensure all main points are adequately supported with specific examples.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is coherent, consider adding more transitional phrases to further enhance the flow.
task achievement
Effectively discusses both views and provides a clear opinion, well-suited for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Clear structure with an introduction, discussion of both views, and a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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