In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In today’s world, many people believe that hard
work
leads to greater achievements.
This
idea is often emphasized by adults when guiding
children
.
While
putting in effort can certainly help
children
build experience and mental resilience, focusing solely on hard
work
might cause them to overlook the importance of
creativity
and critical thinking in reaching their goals. On one hand, encouraging
children
to embrace
this
mindset from an early age can foster persistence and resilience. It is crucial for young people to believe that dedicating themselves to a goal can lead to success.
This
belief can
instill
Change the spelling
instil
show examples
patience as they tackle assignments and manage tasks.
Additionally
, working toward a goal requires emotional strength, as
children
must learn to overcome inevitable setbacks and failures on their path to achievement.
On the other hand
,
while
hard
work
is often associated with success,
this
focus can sometimes stifle
creativity
and independent thinking. Many individuals, as they grow, lose some of their
creativity
and unique perspectives, influenced by societal norms and expectations. From my experience, my parents did not impose strict rules during my childhood, which allowed me to develop more independent ideas than my classmates.
As a result
, I often performed better academically with less effort, relying on my
creativity
and critical thinking. In balance, I believe both aspects of
this
philosophy not only deny each other but can coexist in a child’s mindset.
Children
can benefit from the discipline and perseverance that come with hard
work
while
still nurturing their
creativity
and critical thinking skills.
Submitted by yunhan322 on

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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced view on the topic, discussing both advantages and disadvantages effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and help frame the argument well. This provides coherence to your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have supported your main points with relevant reasoning and examples, making your arguments persuasive.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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