Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Children
also
have various preferences, about what they are interested to
or not. Change the preposition
in
Thus
, their surroundings should be considerate and put
respect to their Verb problem
give
choices
because it also
can affect how other people perceive them. From my perspective, I believe both in giving choices
freely or becoming strict to it, is necessary. However
, I side with giving a decisive situation to children
to decide iwhat
would affect them.
Freeing Correct your spelling
what
children
to choose everything in everyday life can build them into a self-indulgent person in the future. They would be forceful and petty regarding their choices
if the choices
can not be accepted by others. Moreover
, it can make them quite cocky and have less self-awareness to
others. Change preposition
than
For instance
, children
who have numerous preferences that are rejected by society,
would be standing for themselves and pushing other people to acknowledge them rather than embracing other people's opinions.
Remove the comma
apply
In contrast
, children
who are given several options to be chosen,
would be a greater individual who portrays decisive behaviour. They can be mindful of unexpected situations and have an excellent analyzing Remove the comma
apply
skill
in determining the beneficial aspects for them that need to be considered, which would be impactful for their lives. Fix the agreement mistake
skills
For example
, children
who are often taught how to make a decision, would have a wide perspective and protect themselves in dangers or bad situations because of the analyzing skill that they obtain.
To summarize, it is very crucial to give our children
ways to choose their preferences. Nevertheless
, I believe giving the decisions and letting them to
think would be the best action to do in order to nurture and teach them how to possess great Change the verb form
apply
demeanors
later in the future.
kedua Change the spelling
demeanours
gabisa
mandiri
side pertama tp ttp mikir impactnyaCorrect your spelling
Gabia
Submitted by hanalyaa29 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence
Work on organizing your thoughts in a more logical sequence to improve coherence. This will help in clearly presenting your arguments.
cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows logically to the next. Use linking phrases to better connect your ideas.
task response
Consider including more specific examples to support your points, which will add depth to your arguments and illustrate your ideas more clearly.
task response
Strive to express ideas more comprehensively to strengthen your arguments and ensure clarity in conveying your stance.
task response
Your essay covers both views effectively, maintaining a balanced discussion throughout.
coherence
You provided a strong introduction and conclusion, which clearly present your perspective.
task response
You make a good attempt at presenting your viewpoint, showing the complexities in choosing either freedom or strictness in decision-making for children.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.