IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

A builder has recently completed some renovation at your house, but you are not satisfied with his work. Write a letter to him. In your letter:  Tell him what work has not been completed properly  Tell him what you want him to do  Suggest some time when you will be available at home

#builder #renovation #house #work #time #home
Dear Mike, I hope
this
 email finds you well. On October 1, 2024, I hired you at Fray Redg to renovate my house. Unfortunately, I regret to say that I was not completely satisfied with the provided service because it was not performed fully and the products were defective at my house by the way they did not work properly.
Firstly
, you did not seal drafty windows and doors. Please sort out drafty windows and check for air
leaking
Replace the word
leaks
show examples
 by examining areas around the ceiling of the windowpanes.
Secondly
, you did not unclog a dishwasher
that is
 not draining. Please check whether the filter is free from debris, test the drain and inspect the drain host to ensure they are all clean.
Thirdly
, my stairs are creaky. You forgot to fix them.Try sprinkling talcum powder into the joint of the problem step. Fourthly, the doors are always sticking. I kindly ask you to inspect the hinges and tighten the screws. You need to lubricate with a few drops of oil to ease movement. I will be available at home from Monday till Friday from 6 p.m. till 8 p.m. Please contact me on my phone at 380959230574 or email me. Sincerely, Mila
Submitted by krisjeffay1717 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider organizing each problem in a distinct paragraph to improve clarity.
task achievement
Provide a more detailed conclusion or summary to reinforce the main points.
task achievement
The letter maintains a polite and respectful tone throughout.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately included and are well-presented.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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