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Writing Samples
Band 7

In many societies around the world, the population is rapidly aging, and this is leading to unsustainable increases in the cost of public health. The population of the country must pay for their own medical care in the future. Do you agree or disagree with the  statement?

#societies #world #population #increases #cost #health #country #care #future
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These days countries’ populations are getting old and creating problems in terms of finances for
treatment
,
in addition
,
individuals
 may be required to cover a greater portion of their medical
costs
 in the future. I totally agree with
this
 statement because as the
population
 ages, the demand for Healthcare
services
 increases and the
costs
 associated with providing these
services
also
 rise. On the one hand, with an increase in the ageing
population
, the demand for medical care and
health
services
also
 increases. What is more, the need for healthcare professionals
such
 as nurses, medications, and physiotherapists is
also
 on the rise. In order to balance the budget for
health
services
 and other areas,
individuals
 may have to cover a portion of their
treatment
costs
.
This
 can be done by using additional insurance plans or by paying an extra tax for
health
services
.
Otherwise
, the
treatment
 provided may not be of good quality, and
this
 particular group of the
population
 may experience shortages in medication and equipment.
On the other hand
 , older
individuals
 may have to pay for a greater portion of their medical
costs
.
In other words
, perhaps they are on fixed incomes ,
such
 as pensions or social security, and may have to pay more out of their own pocket.
However
, the government should allocate a great budget to cure
such
 people so that not be worried about disease. They tend to have more complex medical needs, which means they need to see the doctor and get medical procedures more often.
This
 leads to even higher medical bills. In order to maintain the sustainability and affordability of Healthcare systems, it may become necessary to shift some of the burden of
costs
 to older
individuals
. In conclusion,
while
 the older
population
 are going to increase and
also
 their medical needs adhere to their age, I believe that they should pay the cost of their
treatment
 because of increasing demand and increasing cost in order to maintain the balance of
health
 systems.
Submitted by ghorabibita on

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relevant specific examples
Try to incorporate more specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments. It would be beneficial to include evidence or case studies that illustrate your points.
supported main points
Ensure that all paragraphs are equally well-developed. The second paragraph provides good details, but ensure the third paragraph maintains that depth.
introduction conclusion present
Clear and well-structured introduction and conclusion, providing a comprehensive overview of your stance.
complete response
The essay effectively addresses different aspects of the issue, considering both the financial implications and the potential burden on individuals.
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