IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Question: Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #newspapers #news #media
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Some
people
 suggest that when it comes to the optimal way of learning news, reading the
newspapers
 comes first place.
However
, others remain persuaded that expanding your knowledge horizon may possess superior traits that make them a better choice for
people
.
Although
 both schools of thought hold merit, my personal opinion expresses a stronger alignment with the latter perspective. On the one hand, there are some reasons that explain why learning from
newspapers
 may be an optimal choice for many
people
.
Firstly
, since
newspapers
 existed long before the introduction of the internet, the habit of learning through paper books has been maintained until now.
Secondly
, news published in the press is often strict.
While
 the internet is vulnerable to fake news and false
information
,
newspapers
, which have to undergo a rigorous examination by professionals and the government, can offer readers great accuracy.
As a result
, verified
information
 could protect readers from misleading
information
.
On the other hand
, broadening your knowledge through TV programs or social media platforms is still essential. By utilizing the advantages of these modern technologies, they could help improve the learning process more conveniently.
People
 can access a huge storage of
information
 with fast updatability that detailed and thoughtful analysis in a matter of minutes.
Besides
, with constant advancement in technology, some online presses have updated a new feature that can convert text to speech, especially supporting the accessing process more helpful. In conclusion,
although
 there are multiple perspectives on getting updated by different new sources, I think that absorbing
information
 from both conventional
newspapers
 and virtual spaces would be better than choosing one
instead
 of the other.
Submitted by n.thach.tu.a2 on

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task achievement
Include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Make sure to address both views equally before stating your opinion, as this can enhance the clarity and balance of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Consider creating clearer paragraph transitions to improve the flow of ideas throughout your essay.
coherence cohesion
Strong introduction and conclusion, providing a comprehensive overview and wrapping up effectively.
task achievement
Clear comparison of newspapers and modern media, which adds depth to the argument.
coherence cohesion
Logical organization of paragraphs, enhancing overall readability.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • news coverage
  • perspectives
  • opinions
  • accessed
  • interactive
  • engaging
  • real-time
  • multimedia
  • combination
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