IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Million of dollars are spent on space every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

#million #dollars #space #year #people #money #standards #earth
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I disagree with the
argue
Replace the word
argument
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 that "money should be spent on living standards improvement on earth".
First,
understanding
space
 could
saves
Change the verb form
save
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 us from some disasters. For
examples
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example
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, it is by our understanding that the moon will
causes
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cause
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 ebb and flow, we can avoid floods.
Also
, the understanding of
space
 helps
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 predict
weathers
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weather
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. In
additionally
Replace the word
addition
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,knowledge about
space
 can
also
 let
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 better address the climate change issues.In fact, the technology that studies how to cultivate life in
space
 can
also
 be applied to human medical treatment.
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
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,
space
explorations
Fix the agreement mistake
exploration
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 is the passion of many scientists studying for studying technology and science, which will be feeding back to the entire human race. Since the birth of science, the universe
was
Wrong verb form
has been
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 a sign of
unknown
Correct article usage
the unknown
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.
humanity's
Capitalize word
Humanity's
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 exploration of
space
 has never stopped. The process of exploring the
unkown
Correct your spelling
unknown
 has
also
 allowed scientists to develop many inventions that are
also
 helpful to ordinary people. In conclusion,
space
 exploration has been closely related to the entire human civilization.The path of studying
space
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 is
also
 the path to improve our living.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, provide more specific examples that directly support your main points. For instance, mention particular space technologies that have benefited life on Earth.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, link your ideas more effectively with transitional words. This will help create a more logical progression of ideas.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a clear stance on the issue, disagreeing with the idea that money spent on space should be redirected towards improving living standards on Earth.
Coherence and Cohesion
There's a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the argument nicely, contributing to a unified and complete response.
Task Achievement
The essay illustrates understanding of the broader implications of space exploration for scientific advancement and human progress.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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