The chart shows the changes of percentage of people born inside and outside of Australia live in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010.

The chart shows the changes of percentage of people born inside and outside of Australia live in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010.
The chart presents the percentage of
people
in
Australia
who were born in
cities
,
towns
, or rural
areas
by comparing them
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between two consecutive years, 1995 and 2010.
In addition
, the chart
also
differenciate
Correct your spelling
differentiate
the
people
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
outside or inside
Australia
Overall
, there is the same trend through the years between 1995 and 2010. Either
people
who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
born inside the
country
or in other countries, dominantly, they were born in
cities
.
Towns
and rural
areas
always be the second and third places, or in reverse.
To begin
, in 1995, more than 50% of
Australia
's
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
first came to the world; those were from the
cities
.
While
the rest were born in rural
areas
and
towns
. The same trend
also
happened for
people
who lived outside the
country
.
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
there is a significant difference
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
people
born in
cities
outside
Australia
more higher
then
people
inside
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
. 15 years later, the amount of
people
who born in
towns
and rural
areas
were dramatically went down to
lower
Correct word choice
less
show examples
than 10%.
Following
this
, 80% of
people
outside the
country
are mostly born in
cities
,
while
, it was 70 % for
people
inside
Australia
.
Submitted by putri on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, australia, cities, towns, areas, country with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

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