Public celebrations (festivals, national day) are held in some countries. Some people think that they are very expensive and the government should spend money on some other important issues. Do you agree or disagree?

Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
host some
celebration
Fix the agreement mistake
celebrations
show examples
for
people
in many countries . But
people
think
this
is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of
money
they have to spend
money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
other important
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
. Yes,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
am agree
Change the verb form
agree
show examples
government
waste
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
money
on festivals and other functions.
Further
, they have too
many works
Fix the agreement mistake
much work
show examples
pending to do .
For instance
, in some cities repair of roads , making
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
and
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
. But nobody
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
action against them . Some
people
sleep without eating and they don'
t
have
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
they just live
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
roads.
Moreover
, we don'
t
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
condemn on
government
only.
some time
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
they give grants to
lower levels
Correct your spelling
lower-level
show examples
politicals member
Fix the agreement mistake
political members
show examples
but they don'
t
do proper work and all
money
Correct article usage
the money
show examples
take
Wrong verb form
taken
show examples
it for
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
homes. Somehow that's the reason behind it.
For example
, in my city the same thing
is happened
Change to the active voice
happens
has happened
show examples
government
give
grant
Fix the agreement mistake
grants
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
making
Verb problem
build
show examples
roads and
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
in
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
but the main leader
don'
Change the verb form
doesn't
show examples
t
do any work and just
host
Correct subject-verb agreement
hosts
show examples
a festival in
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
and
waste
Correct subject-verb agreement
wastes
show examples
all
money
.
This
is only can
correct
Wrong verb form
be corrected
show examples
by
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
they have to take action against political numbers. We have to give
vote
Add an article
a vote
the vote
show examples
to the educator person who
understand
Change the verb form
understands
show examples
us
not
Add the comma(s)
, not
show examples
those who just
waste
money
.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
what they do only
stop
Correct subject-verb agreement
stops
show examples
this
public because they
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
power and make groups and strike against them. I know some
powefull
Correct your spelling
powerful
leaders harm the
people
who raise
our
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
voice
Fix the agreement mistake
voices
show examples
and
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
murders too. But we have to come together and stop it.
Main
Change the article
The main
show examples
thing that we can do is
our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
vote to give
correct
Add an article
the correct
a correct
show examples
person and
then
all things going well.
Submitted by Siya on

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introduction
Provide a clearer and more structured introduction that outlines the main points you will discuss in your essay. This will help readers understand the direction of your argument from the outset.
content development
Develop a more balanced discussion by considering possible benefits or counterarguments to spending on public celebrations.
coherence
Work on improving the logical flow of your ideas. Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your main argument and transitions smoothly to the next.
conclusion
Include a concluding paragraph that summarizes your main points and reiterates your overall argument, strengthening the conclusion.
content
The essay expresses a clear position on the issue, supporting the view that government spending on celebrations can be excessive.
examples
Some relevant examples are provided, such as road and school funding issues, which help to illustrate the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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