IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that we should do our best to mitigate the effects of climate change, while others believe that we should learn how to live with it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #effects #climate #change
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In today's world,
climate
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change
Use synonyms
 become
one
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 of the
beggiset
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biggest
 problems in the
twentith
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twentieth
 century. Both animals and humans suffer
of
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from
show examples
 many illnesses that are caused by
the
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apply
show examples
climate
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change
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.
Therefore
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, some
people
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 believe that it is our
reponsibility
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responsibility
 as a
socaity
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society
 to
satnd
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sit
aginst
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against
show examples
people
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 who are the reason behind making
the
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apply
show examples
climate
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change
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 worse.
Fristly
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Firstly
,
this
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climate
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change
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 is caused by huge companies that only care
of
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about
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 financial returns. Since
that
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then
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 these companies operating factories without considering the
steams
Correct subject-verb agreement
steam
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 that
effecting
Verb problem
affects
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 the weather and air of the city.
While
Linking Words
one
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 of these steams's side
effects
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is
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are
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 causing health
problem
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problems
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to
Change preposition
for
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people
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such
Linking Words
 as
athsma
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asthma
.
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One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
 the other hand, if
people
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 only handled and learnt how to live with
this
Linking Words
 issue, no
one
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will
Wrong verb form
would
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 live in
this
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 plant. Since that the
climate
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change
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 will destroy and kill all
the
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apply
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living creatures.
Moreover
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,
one
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 of the side
effects
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 of the
climate
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change
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 is the high
temparture
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temperature
dgrees
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degrees
. In
addetion
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addition
, being surrounded by
dengrous
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dangerous
steams
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steam
show examples
 will fade away all the clean air.
Therefore
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, I
frimly
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firmly
conform
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confirm
show examples
 that we should teach the
effects
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 of
climate
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change
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 to all
people
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 to spread
the
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apply
show examples
awareness.
Moreover
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, to teach
people
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 the
dengrous
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dangerous
 health problems that may be caused by
the
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apply
show examples
climate
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change
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.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
climate
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change
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 is a serious issue that
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to be solved, and
people
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 should be aware of its
effects
Use synonyms
. To
avoide
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avoid
 many
disadters
Correct your spelling
disasters
 in the future.
Submitted by layan992015 on

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language
Work on correcting spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity and professionalism.
support
Include more specific examples or data to strengthen the arguments.
development
Clarify and elaborate on the points to create a comprehensive response, ensuring each argument is well articulated.
structure
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the discussion effectively.
task
The writing addresses both views on climate change, fulfilling the task requirements.
stance
There's a strong commitment to addressing climate change, showing the writer's standpoint clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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