The graph below shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the united kingdom, Sweden, Italy and portugal between 1957 and 2007

The maps
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
the
place
of
bookstore
Add an article
a bookstore
the bookstore
show examples
in 2000 and now. These changes in the
bookstore
for 24 years show how the
places
inside have changed, and which
places
have been added to the
bookstore
. In 2000 the fiction
books
place
was the largest
place
in
bookstore
Add an article
the bookstore
a bookstore
show examples
which is located at
top
Correct article usage
the top
show examples
of the map and to the left corner.
While
the Art,Hobbies and Cookery bookcases
had
Verb problem
were
show examples
located in the middle of the
bookstore
.The travel
books
,New
books
and service desk
area
had been located
nearby
Correct your spelling
near
show examples
to the entrance.Now the fiction
books
area
became
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
smaller and
instead
of those
places
we can see the art,hobbies and cookery
books
places
,and the non-fiction
area
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
been replaced
instead
of
fiction
Correct article usage
the fiction
show examples
area
to the corner.There is a new cafe
instead
of
non-fiction
Correct article usage
a non-fiction
show examples
books
place
and their tables in the middle of
bookstore
Correct article usage
the bookstore
show examples
instead
of bookcases of art,hobbies and cookery .
While
the
places
of the travel
books
,new
books
and service desk stayed in
their
Change the word
the
show examples
same
places
. In conclusion, Over these
last
24 years,
places
in
bookstore
Fix the agreement mistake
bookstores
show examples
have changed and some
places
had been
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
remained in the same
place
.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "instead, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words place, bookstore, places, books, area with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
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