Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these point of views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays people are so occupied

such

Linking Words

they spend their whole life working

Change preposition

show examples

one

Use synonyms

place even without

realising

Correct pronoun usage

realising it

show examples

Hence

Linking Words

, some pupils argue that it is

important

Correct quantifier usage

more important

show examples

to explore different work

environemnts

Correct your spelling

environments

environment

than spending many years of your life at

single

Add an article

a single

show examples

organization. I will

dicuss

Correct your spelling

discuss

the positive aspects of working at a workplace and at different workplaces

ina

Correct your spelling

in a

show examples

lifespan, in upcoming paragraphs and later will come up with my opinion on

this

Linking Words

statement. First of all, there are various

advantageous

Replace the word

advantages

show examples

of continuing work at a company

Change preposition

apply

show examples

an individual can get promotions and pay

raise

Fix the agreement mistake

raises

show examples

accoriding

Correct your spelling

according

to the government rules with some other benefits of getting timely vacations and sick pay for sick leaves.

For example

Linking Words

, I used to change work

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every 6 months, I barely got any help from the employers in the past.

However

Linking Words

, now I have been working in a childcare centre for more than 1+ year with benefits like insurance, paid sick absences, yearly vacations and many other assets.

Thus

Linking Words

, employing at a company can prove to be greatly

benficial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

Secondly

Linking Words

, finding

Use synonyms

job

Add an article

a job

show examples

in different fields in a

life time

Correct your spelling

lifetime

show examples

can be helpful in a way that a person can get experience and gain knowledge of different things.

For instance

Linking Words

, I see my friend often changing jobs and

one

Use synonyms

day when I asked for the reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

doing so, she said, she gets enough confidence to start over when she is not being treated well, plus she can choose a better salary in less time rather than doing

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

one

Use synonyms

place and waiting for some rude manager to give her

promtion

Correct your spelling

promotion

or a pay raise after years.

Moreover

Linking Words

, I

ponder

Verb problem

think

show examples

it is quite true

sometimes

Correct word choice

that sometimes

show examples

there are chances to get a better

job

Use synonyms

and pay if we are willing to change

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Use synonyms

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

To conclude

Linking Words

, I think there are many promising reasons for people to keep

one

Use synonyms

job

Use synonyms

untill

Correct your spelling

until

retirement and for others too to keep looking for something so they can come out of

the

Change the word

their

show examples

comfort and

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

accept changes. Despite of respective advantages, I feel different situations and mindsets

leads

Correct subject-verb agreement

lead

show examples

diferent

Correct your spelling

different

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

show examples

of thinking about

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

arguments.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is best to do what is good for you.

preetsimran0123Sat Nov 09 2024

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logical structure

Work on improving the logical structure of your essay by organizing your thoughts more clearly into distinct paragraphs. This will help in presenting a more structured argument.

clear comprehensive ideas

Enhance the clarity of your ideas by elaborating on them with more specific details and examples. This will make your response more comprehensive.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a good overall framework for the essay.

relevant specific examples

The essay provides relevant examples to support the main points, using personal experiences to illustrate the arguments.

complete response

The response thoroughly addresses both viewpoints as required by the task, showing a balanced discussion.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

366 words

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Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time. discus both these views, and give your opinion.

Some people believe that government grants should be offered to people to encourage them to buy electric vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children can learn effectively by watching TV and they should be encouraged to watch TV both at home and school. To what extent do you agree or disagree? – Disagree -

Human activities have negative effects on the plant and animal species. Some people think it is too late to do anything about this problem. Others believe that effective measures can be taken to improve this question. Discuss both views and give your opinion.