Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these point of views and give your opinion.

#people #work #organization #life #organizations #point

Nowadays people are so occupied

such

they spend their whole life working

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show examples

one

place even without

realising

Correct pronoun usage

realising it

show examples

Hence

, some pupils argue that it is

important

Correct quantifier usage

more important

show examples

to explore different work

environemnts

Correct your spelling

environments

environment

than spending many years of your life at

single

Add an article

a single

show examples

organization. I will

dicuss

Correct your spelling

discuss

the positive aspects of working at a workplace and at different workplaces

ina

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in a

show examples

lifespan, in upcoming paragraphs and later will come up with my opinion on

this

statement. First of all, there are various

advantageous

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advantages

show examples

of continuing work at a company

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apply

show examples

an individual can get promotions and pay

raise

Fix the agreement mistake

raises

show examples

accoriding

Correct your spelling

according

to the government rules with some other benefits of getting timely vacations and sick pay for sick leaves.

For example

, I used to change work

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apply

show examples

every 6 months, I barely got any help from the employers in the past.

However

, now I have been working in a childcare centre for more than 1+ year with benefits like insurance, paid sick absences, yearly vacations and many other assets.

Thus

, employing at a company can prove to be greatly

benficial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

Secondly

, finding

job

Add an article

a job

show examples

in different fields in a

life time

Correct your spelling

lifetime

show examples

can be helpful in a way that a person can get experience and gain knowledge of different things.

For instance

, I see my friend often changing jobs and

one

day when I asked for the reason

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for

show examples

doing so, she said, she gets enough confidence to start over when she is not being treated well, plus she can choose a better salary in less time rather than doing

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

one

place and waiting for some rude manager to give her

promtion

Correct your spelling

promotion

or a pay raise after years.

Moreover

, I

ponder

Verb problem

think

show examples

it is quite true

sometimes

Correct word choice

that sometimes

show examples

there are chances to get a better

job

and pay if we are willing to change

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

To conclude

, I think there are many promising reasons for people to keep

one

job

untill

Correct your spelling

until

retirement and for others too to keep looking for something so they can come out of

the

Change the word

their

show examples

comfort and

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

accept changes. Despite of respective advantages, I feel different situations and mindsets

leads

Correct subject-verb agreement

lead

show examples

diferent

Correct your spelling

different

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

show examples

of thinking about

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

arguments.

Therefore

, it is best to do what is good for you.

Submitted by preetsimran0123 on Sat Nov 09 2024

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logical structure

Work on improving the logical structure of your essay by organizing your thoughts more clearly into distinct paragraphs. This will help in presenting a more structured argument.

clear comprehensive ideas

Enhance the clarity of your ideas by elaborating on them with more specific details and examples. This will make your response more comprehensive.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a good overall framework for the essay.

relevant specific examples

The essay provides relevant examples to support the main points, using personal experiences to illustrate the arguments.

complete response

The response thoroughly addresses both viewpoints as required by the task, showing a balanced discussion.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

366 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these point of views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree? Use specific details and examples to explain your view.

Aircrafts have been increasingly used to transport fruit and vegetable to some countries where such plants hardly grow or out of season. Some people consider it a good idea but some people oppose it.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantges of this outweight the disadvantages?

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.