IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#show #bowen #island #survey #visitors #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Linking Words
This
Correct determiner usage
These
show examples
pie
Use synonyms
chatrs
Correct your spelling
charts
 illustrate the figure of Bowen
Isalnd
Correct your spelling
Island
,
although
Linking Words
lets
Replace the word
let's
let us
show examples
 start
decriping
Correct your spelling
decrypting
describing
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 and cons
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 that.The Advantages show that 42 % of the people
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 getting the
befints
Correct your spelling
benefits
befits
 and 12% of
Correct article usage
the cultre
show examples
cultre
Correct your spelling
culture
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
also
Linking Words
 showing on ,
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 The
senecry
Correct your spelling
scenery
 show
enormous
Correct article usage
an enormous
show examples
precentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of the
pie
Use synonyms
 and the least was good
accomindation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 we have checked the
disadvanatges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
pie
Use synonyms
 chart , it
showen
Correct your spelling
showed
shows
 that has remarkable
Percantage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of high
coast
Correct your spelling
cost
show examples
 of
linving
Correct your spelling
living
 50 % of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 results completing with entertainment takes 25 % of
Use synonyms
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 well that shows a
marvelous
Change the spelling
marvellous
show examples
 percentage and how enjoyment is taking place by Disadvanates of the
pie
Use synonyms
 , Moving on to
waether
Correct your spelling
weather
whether
 showing 15 %
also
Linking Words
wherease
Correct your spelling
whereas
 less than both
presentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
present age
 mentioned
pervoiusly
Correct your spelling
previously
 and Ending by food
qulity
Correct your spelling
quality
 where
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 not showing that big
diffrence
Correct your spelling
difference
 Of Negative there . in
conclousin
Correct your spelling
conclusion
 both
pies
Correct your spelling
parties
show examples
 show how to Obtain and
concentratite
Correct your spelling
concentrate
concentrating
about
Change preposition
on
show examples
 factors
off
Change preposition
apply
show examples
pros and cons and
Furthermore
Linking Words
 ,obligate to increase
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Updating features .
Summaraizing
Correct your spelling
Summarizing
, the tex over is always
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
 precious time to
satnd
Correct your spelling
sit
 for population analysis for both advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island
According to
Linking Words
to
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
selecting and reporting other
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
places there for .
Submitted by nouf.alsaleh33 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words pie with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • scenic beauty
  • peaceful environment
  • wildlife viewing
  • limited accessibility
  • high costs
  • lack of amenities
  • tourist experience
  • perceived strongly
  • overwhelmingly stands out
  • main features
  • key advantages
  • primary disadvantages
  • notable aspects
  • common perceptions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: