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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Other thinki that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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Many people spend their entire working lives in the same
organization
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,
while
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 others believe that it is better to
work
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 for multiple companies. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both perspectives and provide my own opinion. On the
one
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 hand, staying with the same
organization
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 throughout
one
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’s career can offer several advantages.
One
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 of the main benefits is job stability, as employees become familiar with their
work
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 environment and colleagues, which can foster a strong sense of community and comfort.
Additionally
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, for professions that require specialized knowledge or extensive training,
such
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 as doctors or scientists, staying in the same institution allows them to grow within their field and establish expertise in their specific
work
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 setting. Personally, I think working at the same
organization
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 can be beneficial, as it often leads to deeper job security and less risk.
On the other hand
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, working in different organizations can provide diverse experiences and opportunities. Changing workplaces exposes individuals to various
work
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 cultures, which can broaden their perspectives and enhance both social and professional skills.
For instance
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, if an employee moves from a smaller company to a global
one
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 like Google, it may involve some risks
due to
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 the new environment, but it can
also
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 lead to significant personal growth and improved financial rewards.
This
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 variety in experience can make individuals more adaptable, which is a valuable asset in today’s competitive job market. In conclusion, staying with
one
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organization
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 offers stability and security,
while
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 working for different companies provides broader experiences and growth opportunities. Ultimately, the choice depends on individual goals and preferences, but a mix of both could offer the best balance of stability and skill development.

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task achievement
To further enhance task achievement, you could include more specific examples or case studies that highlight the benefits or drawbacks of staying with one company versus moving between organizations.
coherence cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, consider using more transition words or phrases to further smoothly connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay and guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses both views of the topic, discussing the advantages of both staying with the same organization and moving between different ones. This results in a complete and balanced response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both clear and present, effectively framing the discussion and summarizing the points made.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported with logical reasoning, such as citing specialized professions and exposure to diverse work cultures.
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