It is now possible for scientist and tourist to travel to remote natural environment, such as the south pole. Do the adventages of this development outweigh disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The possibility of visiting desolate natural environments nowadays for human beings can have both advantages and disadvantages. In my opinion, I agree that the benefits are more prominent despite the negative impacts. In the next few sentences, I would like to discuss both sides. Exploring isolated nature has a positive impact on scientists and tourists. Scientists will be able to observe numerous unknown spots or habitats for research. We never know if some areas or habitats can help humans to find new cures for diseases.
Furthermore
, the tourists will have a remarkable experience from fascinating South Poles, as we know, it is covered by ice. There are additional benefits for the private sector. which are, the need for transportation services, it helps companies to grow and
not to mention
opening job vacancies,
for example
, if students from a college plan to visit the South Poles, of course, the transportation companies should provide vehicles, drivers and tour guides more than usual.
On the other hand
, the downside of
this
travelling can affect the environment. Irresponsible tourists, tend to litter anywhere without pondering what might occur.
In addition
, irresponsible scientists will conduct an experiment that
consequently
interrupts the entire habitat, as a sample, using exploded materials to observe unreachable spots and murder local creatures for experiments. In brief, the advantages of visiting desolate environments will lead to potential invention and increased profits for the private sector.
However
, it clearly has the potential to harm the areas and habitats. Even so, the government can create strict regulations in order to preserve desolate places from those not responsible.
Submitted by mutiaraanggun1995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Consider diversifying the range of examples to give a broader perspective of the possible advantages or disadvantages.
clear comprehensive ideas
Try to include more detailed solutions or recommendations (e.g., specific regulations) to strengthen the argument about government intervention.
logical structure
Some sentences could be made clearer with additional connectors or transitional phrases to improve the flow of ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which provide a strong framework for your discussion.
complete response
The essay effectively outlines both advantages and disadvantages, showcasing a balanced examination of the topic.
clear comprehensive ideas
There are clear, relevant ideas supporting both sides of the argument, structured in a coherent manner.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: