Write about the following topic: Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#topic #people #success #career #education

What is

success

? Answering

this

question varies from different points of view. Some people see that in education,

while

others believe that being successful means making more money. I personally believe that each

person

has a unique

answer

for the question, and it depends on a variety of aspects.

Success

has different meanings for individuals. There are a variety of aspects that impact our idea about

success

. Living in a different culture, growing up in a wealthy or poor family, having religious parents and some other aspects, could directly affect how to

answer

such

questions. Some people find it ,in having a high level of educational degree,

while

others find it in running a big company. Being famous is a huge

success

for someone ,

while

the other finds it in having a big family.

Thus

there are several ways to meaning the word, and I believe that being successful is about finding our unique

answer

Although

the word,

success

, is

varied

Replace the word

varies

show examples

from

person

, I believe that we should consider what really makes us happier. To find the

answer

, we should not follow another

person

, neither our family nor our counterparts, we must explore what is more valuable for us. For me,

success

is running my own school in my country,Iran, which will respect all of its students' interests. I have worked as a teacher for more than 15 years and I always had a feeling about the big gap between our educational system and the latest educational approaches and methods in developed countries. bringing a better education system for my fellow citizens is my definition of

success

. All different people around the world have a different definition of being successful, It is because they live in distinctive situations and have different backgrounds. Making more money, studying at a high level of education, and being famous are some of these answers. I believe that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

to find the true

answer

, we should know more about ourselves.

Submitted by rozakoohvand on Mon Nov 11 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Try to use more transitional words and phrases to improve the logical flow of your ideas, which will enhance the coherence of your essay.

Task Achievement

Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your main points and illustrate your ideas more vividly.

Coherence and Cohesion

Consider structuring your essay with clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids understanding.

Task Achievement

You addressed the essay prompt well, offering a definition of success from both personal and general perspectives.

Task Achievement

The essay shows an understanding of the topic by differentiating between various interpretations of success.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

325 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Write about the following topic: Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that humanitarian subjects such as philosophy, history and literature that people study in universities have no value for their future career. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and relevant examples.

Some people believe that alcohol should be considered a drug and made illegal. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

some people think that teachers should be responsible for teaching students to judge what is right and wrong so that they can behave well others say that teachers should only teach students academic subjects disduss both views and give your opinion.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious problems

task2: Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives. In what ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make?