IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many of today’s most urgent problems can only be solved through international cooperation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#today’s #cooperation
Nowadays, the majority of urban issues
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
 be decided without international communication and agreements between those nations. Actually, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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 a
quantity
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number
show examples
 of problems, which we
are facing
Wrong verb form
face
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 in our usual lives.
Therefore
, I am going to open
the
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up the
show examples
 solutions and reasons, which will clarify my personal point of view on
this
 topic.
Overall
 ,
an
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apply
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 issues
such
 as
,
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apply
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 overpopulation, clogged
trafic
Correct your spelling
traffic
 on the roads or even in supermarkets,
leading
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
 us to global problems.
Firstly
,
these kind
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this kind
these kinds
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 of issues
facing
Wrong verb form
face
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 countries,
such
 as India and China because of their huge birth rate. Despite, the fact that
,
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apply
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size
Correct article usage
the size
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 of these countries
Add a missing verb
is signifacant
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signifacant
Correct your spelling
significant
significantly
, they are the ones who suffer from
this
.
Likewise
,
secondly
, is that bad hygiene and misunderstanding of how
nation
Add an article
the nation
a nation
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 should protect
themselfs
Correct your spelling
themselves
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, from conceiving a child ruined
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life in huge cities.
However
, is a way harder to get rid of overpopulation in cities,
such
 as Peckin or New Delhi. In my
prospective
Correct your spelling
perspective
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, I reckon that governments should cooperate together and discuss the reasons and solutions.
Aditionally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
, it would be a lot easier, if
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 or
Europe
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European
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 nations helped in
financial
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a financial
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 way and
gived
Correct your spelling
gave
 them some amount of help in local currency or
medicaments
Fix the agreement mistake
medicament
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. Actually, even default support in
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
increasing the level of
eductionional
Correct your spelling
educational
 progress in poor or overpopulated countries could fix the
grow
Replace the word
growth
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 of
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
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 rate.
To sum up
,
Correct article usage
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
international cooperation plays
Correct article usage
a significnat
show examples
Correct article usage
a significnat
show examples
Correct your spelling
significant
significnat
Correct your spelling
significant
 role in solving these kinds of problems, as well it
helped
Wrong verb form
helps
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 local families or
usual
Correct word choice
normal
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 workers with their transportation or the level of their lives.
Nevertheless
. I reckon that nations all over the world should communicate and play
critical
Add an article
a critical
show examples
 role.
Submitted by stepanantoniuk07 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your essay into clear paragraphs with distinct points. This will improve the logical flow and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, specific programs or initiatives that involve international cooperation addressing overpopulation could strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Clarify your ideas by breaking them down into more precise claims. Instead of mentioning 'default support,' specify what kind of educational programs or financial aid you mean.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a thoughtful conclusion that effectively summarizes your points and emphasizes the importance of international cooperation.
task achievement
You've successfully identified relevant issues such as overpopulation and traffic congestion, linking them to the need for international cooperation.

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