People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#people #money #tax

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The benefits of paying

taxes

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has

Change the verb form

have

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been a relevant issue in our society. The

people

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believe that they are not getting their money's worth considering the state of our country and that paying

taxes

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should be stopped. I disagree because I believe that the proper allocation of our

taxes

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would improve the quality of life of our community and terminating

this

Linking Words

system would bring about chaos.

Taxes

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cost a significant amount of our salaries.

This

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deduction is felt more by those in the middle to lower class.

Although

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the cost is significant, the programs and benefits that these

taxes

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fund are advantageous

especially

Add the comma(s)

, especially

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those involving health and retirement.

Moreover

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, these

taxes

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support the maintenance and operations of facilities that we use daily

such

Linking Words

as roads, parks, and schools.

Furthermore

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, it does not only help the working class but

also

Linking Words

those who are unfortunate

such

Linking Words

as the oppressed and homeless to build a life and get out of poverty.

However

Linking Words

, these advantages are hardly implemented. Facilities are not managed well, not enough programs are launched to help those in poverty, and more importantly, health benefits offered today are not enough to ensure the well-being of the community. These lapses led to the poor education, health, and financial status of our community.

In addition

Linking Words

, the government keeps on increasing our

taxes

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yet they are not delivering satisfactory results.

This

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is the reason why

people

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are enraged and demand that they keep their money rather than pay

taxes

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. In conclusion, I disagree with the statement that we should stop paying

taxes

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. Rather than that, the government should manage the

people

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taxes

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with integrity and should allocate it justly so that the

people

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do not feel cheated out of their money.

Submitted by erickacasandra.abas on Tue Nov 12 2024

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task achievement

You have provided a complete response to the task with well-structured arguments. However, try to include more specific examples to enhance your points.

coherence cohesion

The essay is logically structured, with clear connections between ideas, but ensure transitions between paragraphs are more varied to maintain reader engagement.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction is effective in setting the context for the discussion, and the conclusion provides a strong summary of your viewpoint.

task achievement

The essay presents ideas clearly, with comprehensive coverage of the topic's arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

contribute
welfare
public services
progressive taxation
distribution of wealth
civic duty
social cohesion
tax evasion
economic disparities
social unrest
individual rights
societal responsibilities

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