Some people believe that good planning is the key factor to success in life. Others think there are more important factors (hard work or luck). Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some influenced by
people
think that have
Wrong verb form
having
a
good Correct article usage
apply
consideration
is Fix the agreement mistake
considerations
one
of the important factor
to being Fix the agreement mistake
factors
success
. Others think there are more important Replace the word
successful
factor
. To consider the example of Fix the agreement mistake
factors
successful
person in my life, I believe that there are more important Add an article
a successful
factor
to Fix the agreement mistake
factors
success
. The factors od
being Correct your spelling
of
success
Replace the word
successful
is
unpredictable.
The Correct subject-verb agreement
are
opportunity
. We can see many professional career
in Hong Kong . Change to a plural noun
careers
Such
as funeral arranger
and Fix the agreement mistake
arrangers
lawyer
. To be Fix the agreement mistake
lawyers
these
Change preposition
in these
carreer
, Correct your spelling
careers
people
have to learn the professional knowledge of relative career
first. But this
is just the first step. People
need to get offer
and qualifications. If you already get the Fix the agreement mistake
offers
qyalifications
of your Correct your spelling
qualifications
qualification
career
. You still have to get opportunity
to be that professional Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
career
. For example
, funeral arranger. It is a quite seriously
Change the word
serious
career
for everybody. Because it is about death. Funeral arranger
have to complete their work carefully and you need to Fix the agreement mistake
arrangers
fina
a Correct your spelling
find
job
by the relative people
. The customer have
to find the Change the verb form
has
prople
Correct your spelling
people
who
they trust . Good planning is not the Change the pronoun
whom
one
hundred percent
for you to get a Change the spelling
per cent
job
. The importtant
factors Correct your spelling
important
is
luck and Change the verb form
are
opportunity
.
The society trend. Hong Kong's birth percentage became lower every year. The student
in Hong Kong become lower. The needs of Fix the agreement mistake
number of students
teacher
become lower. So Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
teacher
is harder than before. We never know what will happen in the next year or even Correct article usage
a teacher
next
day. Good planning is not the most important Correct article usage
the next
factor
to
Change preposition
in
success
in life because you can not predict the future.
On the other hand
, good planning is one
of the factor
being Fix the agreement mistake
factors
success
. Add an article
a success
Such
as the pianist
. People
have to get the qualifications of
piano Change preposition
for
exam
so that they can be Fix the agreement mistake
exams
the
Correct article usage
apply
pianist
. To be a successful Fix the agreement mistake
pianists
pianist
, you need to practice piano when you were kids. Pianist
is a job
that need
lots of time for training. If Change the verb form
needs
people
want to be pianist
when they grow up, they have to plan. Add an article
a pianist
For example
, famous
Correct article usage
the famous
pianist
Lang Lang in China. He participated lots
of piano Change preposition
in lots
competition
and Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
showcase
when he was young. He Correct subject-verb agreement
showcases
need
to find lots of opportunities to get attention Change the verb form
needs
by
other Change preposition
from
people
. So he need
to plan when he was a child. To consider the Wrong verb form
needed
job
type, good planning is one
of the important factors to be success
.
Replace the word
successful
To sum up
, people
have different view
about Fix the agreement mistake
views
Correct article usage
the factor
factor
of being successful. I think that being successfulFix the agreement mistake
factors
Add a missing verb
is
opportunity
and society
Replace the word
societal
trend
that Fix the agreement mistake
trends
unpredictable
. But good planning is Add a missing verb
are unpredictable
the
Correct article usage
apply
one
of the important factor
to being Change to a plural noun
factors
success
.Replace the word
successful
Submitted by asllchkied on
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language
Improve grammatical accuracy, taking care with subject-verb agreement and correct word usage.
coherence
Enhance paragraph structures to maintain logical flow and coherence.
task response
Provide more specific and detailed examples to support your points.
task achievement
The essay considers both views on the topic, which demonstrates an understanding of different perspectives.
coherence
Clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame the discussion effectively.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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