People nowadays are spending more time at the workplace and it is argued that this is a problem for family life. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Presently, humans are spending more
time
at the workplace and it is assumed that family lives are affected greatly by it. Use synonyms
This
essay agrees completely with Linking Words
this
statement, because during Linking Words
a
day, people have limited Correct article usage
the
hours
and employees are struggling with getting more paid and Use synonyms
traffic
issues, Use synonyms
therefore
they are staying for late Linking Words
hours
and barely, have any Use synonyms
time
left for the family.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, employers and companies are making more complex work Linking Words
hours
, Use synonyms
such
as 9-5 rather than 9-2, Linking Words
furthermore
, declining the wage per hour so that people are obliged to work till midnight in order to nurture the family properly. Linking Words
Thus
, in families, couples with offspring, especially mothers, are leaving maternity and paternity holidays quite early. Linking Words
As a result
, the children have to spend the majority of their Linking Words
time
without their parents and it leads to some behaviour issues like crimes, joining gangs etc. in the future.
Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
as well as
working Linking Words
hours
, there is a Use synonyms
traffic
problem, which contributes heavily to huge Use synonyms
time
consumption on the roads, particularly in the megapolis cities. Use synonyms
For example
, it is evident that the majority of workers finish their jobs at 6 pm and they take off straight away at the same Linking Words
time
. Use synonyms
As a consequence
, roads are loaded by public transport and vehicles, so it creates Linking Words
traffic
jams, which reduces the Use synonyms
time
that should be spent with a family, couples come home after being stressed because of Use synonyms
traffic
and reflect negatively each other by these nerves.
In conclusion, at the moment, people are spending Use synonyms
time
more than average in the office and companies and it is believed that it gives rise to family problems. It absolutely agrees, because humans are not able to have unlimited Use synonyms
time
in a day, they should spend more Use synonyms
hours
to be well paid Use synonyms
due to
the low salary, Linking Words
in addition
to Linking Words
this
, Linking Words
traffic
restricts the Use synonyms
time
that could be spent with family.Use synonyms
Submitted by novruzluahmed2007 on
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task achievement
Ensure that examples provided are relevant and effectively illustrate the points being discussed.
For instance, while the essay mentions 'traffic problems' and living in 'megapolis cities', providing specific examples or statistical data would strengthen this point.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to enhance the logical flow of the essay.
Words like 'moreover', 'furthermore', and 'thus' are already used well. Consider incorporating additional transitions for further clarity, such as 'while', 'on the other hand' and 'as a result'.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear and structured response to the task, adequately covering the aspects suggested by the question.
coherence cohesion
The arguments are well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which helps to maintain coherence throughout.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?