Many things that used to be done in the home by hands are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?

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With the advancement of technology, nowadays many things that used to be hand-made are now being done by

machines

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This

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essay will suggest that time efficiency and consistency of quality are the biggest advantages of

this

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topic,

whereas

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the potential

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for

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unemployment and high maintenance

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cost

Fix the agreement mistake

costs

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are the primary disadvantages. To commence, I will discuss the advantages of using

machines

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for

production

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Firstly

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, by using

machines

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, the

production

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of products will be completed faster

due to

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the speed of

machines

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, which is certainly different from hand-made.

For instance

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, the

production

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of a scarf will likely be done in less than 2 days,

while

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it might take longer for hand-made

production

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Secondly

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, the quality of products by

machines

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consistently remained stable,

whereas

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for

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apply

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hand-made things had the probability of declining quality

due to

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human error. Meanwhile, the

production

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machines

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also

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has disadvantages for both the loss of employment and the high maintenance

cost

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. By using

machines

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, it will lead to a massive layoff for the workers that work in the industry.

As a result

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, many people with excellent craft skills will be replaced by

machines

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and they won't have an income for their lives .

Furthermore

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, the maintenance of

machines

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is quite expensive and will

cost

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most of the expenses of the company. It is

also

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not guaranteed that the revenue of the product will cover the

cost

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expenses. In conclusion,

production

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machines

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can offer significant advantages for the product.

However

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, they must be aware of the potential high

cost

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that might not be covered by the massive

production

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salwaputrihardiyanWed Nov 13 2024

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relevant specific examples

Consider providing more specific examples to support your points, such as statistics or case studies.

clear comprehensive ideas

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly refers to the question posed, enhancing the focus.

logical structure

Try to link your paragraphs more fluidly with transitional phrases to improve the flow of the essay.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing and addressing the topic effectively.

complete response

The task was clearly understood and addressed, with both advantages and disadvantages presented.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Automation
Efficiency
Manual labor
Displacement
Homemaking skills
Technological advancements
Self-sufficiency
Resource depletion
Energy efficiency
Social dynamics
Operational understanding

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Many things that used to be done in the home by hands are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

A few people debate that technological inventions like cell phones are making people socially less interactive. To what extend do you agree with this statement

Increasing the price is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree?

Some people think that the best way to resolve environmental problems is to increase fuel and vehicles’ prices. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say this is a positive trend, while others argue that it leads to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.