IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem and it may lead to the extiction of animal life and human life. Do you agree or disagree?

These days, deforestation has been a prime issue which might contribute to placing all kinds of living
being
Replace the word
beings
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 on the verge of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
extinction. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement as all of us are witnessing adverse transformations in the Earth.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, cutting down
trees
Use synonyms
 in excessive
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 leads to problems
such
Linking Words
 as global warming.
Trees
Use synonyms
 remove carbon dioxide in the atmosphere and emit oxygen which is a main source for all
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 and creatures on the planet. When
trees
Use synonyms
 are being logged, the high rate of carbon in the air
cause
Replace the word
causes
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 the ozone layer to be ruined, leading to global warming.
This
Linking Words
makes
Verb problem
causes
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 some catastrophic phenomena
such
Linking Words
 as flooding which causes habitat loss for many creatures. In some
regions
Add a comma
regions,
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 there are some precious
material
Fix the agreement mistake
materials
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such
Linking Words
 as gold which can be mined.
This
Linking Words
 makes greedy local people
to
Change the verb form
apply
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destroy tropical rainforests which are one the main sources and are abundant
of
Change preposition
in
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 various flora and
funa
Correct your spelling
fauna
.
This
Linking Words
 can cause dire consequences not only on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
climate change, but it
also
Linking Words
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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 economic impacts as well, which means the depletion of sources that many communities and industries rely on. In order to overcome
this
Linking Words
 situation,
individual
Add an article
an individual
the individual
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 should alter their logging practice by exchanging seedlings with logged
trees
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 results in balancing
ecosystem
Add an article
the ecosystem
show examples
.
To sum up
Linking Words
, felling
trees
Use synonyms
 in excess leads to dying out all human beings and biodiversity on the Earth. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because it is apparent how deforestation affects all forms of life. Owing to
emmitting
Correct your spelling
emitting
 oxygen
trees
Use synonyms
 can prevent many
crisis
Change to a plural noun
crises
show examples
 which are adverse
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the world,
such
Linking Words
 as intercepting flooding
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
reducing the amount of global temperature and balancing the
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 in a region.

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task achievement
Include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Referencing specific studies, events, or data could add credibility.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are clearly outlined, but ensure each point clearly connects back to the central thesis that deforestation leads to extinction.
introduction and conclusion
The introduction clearly states your position and the conclusion effectively summarizes your ideas, reinforcing your argument.
logical structure
Logical progression of ideas from the introduction, to the arguments in the main body, and finally to the conclusion.
task achievement
The essay addresses all parts of the question and provides a thoughtful response with multiple arguments.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • deforestation
  • biodiversity
  • sustainable
  • ecosystem
  • carbon emissions
  • indigenous communities
  • sustainable forest management
  • desertification
  • ecological balance
  • water cycle
  • carbon dioxide absorption
  • habitat destruction
  • environmental degradation
  • climate change impact
  • economic losses
What to do next:
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