In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be case ? Do you think this is a positive or negative situtaion?

In some countries, many people consider owning a home
does
Change the verb form
to do
show examples
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
things that
really
Add a missing verb
are really
show examples
needed than renting.
Additionally
, I believe
that is
not fully true and it can be a negative situation. As I have said before,
those statement
Change the determiner
that statement
those statements
show examples
can
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
a negative situation.
It
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
mostly
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
persons do not have money
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
buy
Change the verb form
buying
show examples
a house and the prices for a house
does
Verb problem
are
show examples
not cheap or even affordable.
Therefore
, these moments can be
burden
Add an article
a burden
show examples
for them. Especially, If the person
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
credit for
pay
Change the verb form
paying
show examples
a home that certainly
it does
Verb problem
is
show examples
not well to
suistainable
Correct your spelling
sustainable
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, renting a house will be
helps
Replace the word
helpful
show examples
for the citizens.
For example
, many
rentainers
Correct your spelling
retailers
retainers
offer
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
customers
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
benefits or even services that the
servis
Correct your spelling
service
will
be already
Verb problem
allow
show examples
24 hours to serve them.
Thus
, it really will be
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
for the citizens.
As a result
, they do not have
thinks
Change the verb form
to think
show examples
about the problem that will come to them,
such
as
there
Correct word choice
if there
show examples
is a problem with the bed and the
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
mistakes. In summary, I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
renting a place to live
really
Add a missing verb
is really
show examples
hellpfully
Correct your spelling
helpful
helpfully
for the citizens and
those statement
Change the determiner
that statement
those statements
show examples
can not be accepted.
Otherwise
, owning a home does not
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
and can be
burden
Add an article
a burden
show examples
for them.
Submitted by millionmiles.indonesia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion advice
Try to structure your essay more clearly with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Ensure that each paragraph flows logically to the next.
task achievement advice
Work on providing more specific examples to support your main points. Examples can significantly strengthen your arguments.
task achievement advice
Aim for clearer and more comprehensive ideas. Ensure each main point is fully developed and explained in your essay.
task achievement highlight
The essay presents a clear stance on home ownership versus renting.
coherence cohesion highlight
The attempt to explain the negative sides of owning a home is evident, showcasing an understanding of potential socioeconomic problems.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • equity
  • permanence
  • social status
  • financial investment
  • real estate appreciation
  • stability
  • customization
  • long-term asset
  • mortgage
  • property taxes
  • investment return
  • landlord
  • tenant
  • socio-economic status
  • homeownership responsibilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: