IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The image explains how puerh raw tea and ripe tea are made

The diagram illustrates the
process
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 of making two types of
Pu-erh
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tea
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: Raw
Pu-erh
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 and Ripe
Pu-erh
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.
This
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process
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 includes several stages, from preparing fresh
tea
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 leaves to producing the final
tea
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 products.
Overall
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, both types of
tea
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 start with similar steps but differ later on. Raw
Pu-erh
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tea
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 is made by compressing and ageing the
tea
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 leaves,
while
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 Ripe
Pu-erh
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 undergoes a fermentation
process
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 before being compressed. The
process
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 begins with fresh
tea
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 leaves, which are pan-fried to stop enzyme activity. After frying, the leaves are rolled and dried under the sun. At
this
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 point, loose raw
tea
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 is produced, which can follow two different paths. For Raw
Pu-erh
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tea
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, the loose
tea
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 leaves are simply compressed, creating
Pu-erh
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 Raw
Tea
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.
This
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tea
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 can
then
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 be aged in storage to become Vintage
Pu-erh
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 Raw
Tea
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. To make Ripe
Pu-erh
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tea
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, the loose raw
tea
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 goes through an extra step. It is fermented by adding mould, which turns it into loose ripe
tea
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. After fermentation, the
tea
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 is compressed into
Pu-erh
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 Ripe
Tea
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, completing the
process
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.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are well-defined and clear for the reader, summarizing key stages and differences succinctly.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or details where possible to strengthen your explanations, particularly in the fermentation and aging stages.
task achievement
The essay effectively distinguishes between the production processes of Raw Pu-erh and Ripe Pu-erh tea.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is commendable, with clear stages detailed comprehensively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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