Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country whew they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Specialists with certain skills prefer to
work
in big cities, and as a result
, the gap between the metropolis and the country becomes larger. While
some people believe that skilful individuals should work
for at least a few years in small cities to develop them, others think this
can violate individuals' right to where to work
. I agree that the right to choose one's work
location should be applied to all jobs. This
essay will describe both views with relevant examples and reasons.
On the one hand, some of the public argue that mandatory service period only for certain vocations is unfair. They believe that in a democratic society, it is not reasonable to force professionals to work
in small towns. For example
, employees at Korea Industrial National Bank strongly protested when the government announced the plan that move the headquarters of the bank to another city from Seoul. Just requiring the sacrifice of individuals who have a certain job without other appropriate measures can cause negative reactions.
On the other hand
, others think that professionals should work
in the country to secure necessary social services for locals. For instance
, due to
the lack of big hospitals in the
rural Correct article usage
apply
area
, some folks who are injured can miss their golden time to save their lives on their way to the doctors. Fix the agreement mistake
areas
However
, trainees for professional jobs cannot be a great help to solve this
problem. It's time to consider what is the best solution so that local residents can get mandatory services such
as medical and welfare.
To conclude
, the mandatory working of professionals can help to ease the problems of rural areas, however
, it can result in demotivation of those who have certain jobs. Therefore
, a comprehensive approach is needed to solve the discrepancy between major cities and the country.Submitted by ywb516 on
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task achievement
While the essay provides a satisfactory response to the question, including examples, the argument could be enhanced by more precise examples and clear, detailed explanations. Aim to develop your main ideas further by examining the implications, counterarguments, and providing solid, real-world examples to strengthen your position
coherence cohesion
The essay is mostly coherent with a clear structure, indicated by the introductory and concluding paragraphs. However, transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt, and the development of ideas can be improved for better flow. Work on connecting sentences and paragraphs smoothly, using a range of cohesive devices, and ensuring that each paragraph logically flows from one to the next.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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