IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five protains of fruits and vegatables per day in the UK from 2001 and 2008

The bar chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five protains of fruits and vegatables per day in the UK from 2001 and 2008
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graphic discusses the proportion of people who ate fruits and vegetables each day in the UK over a period of eight years. At
first
Use synonyms
 sight, we can divide the individuals into two groups: the
first
Use synonyms
 one is younger people which participants prefer to eat less and the second group is older who show a significant preference for proteins and vegetables.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the
first
Use synonyms
 band which is involved in children's eating proteins was around 13% in the
first
Use synonyms
 year of the study, 16% in 2004 and
finally
Linking Words
 23% in 2008. The peak of food eaten by younger individuals was in 2007 at 26%.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the second group which contains women and men illustrates an increase in the intake of foodstuff. Women adopted food around 16% in 2001, 27% in 2007 and 26% in 2008. Meanwhile, men chose foodstuff 24% in 2002, 35% in 2006 and 30% in the
last
Linking Words
 year.
to sum up
Linking Words
, the bar chart shows the percentage of people who prefer to eat protein and vegetables from 2001 to 2008,
also
Linking Words
 it can be seen a peak of healthy food eaten in the years 2006 and 2007,
while
Linking Words
 the
first
Use synonyms
 period has the least count of fruits preferred.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words first with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Portion: a serving size of food.
  • Trend: a general direction in which something is developing or changing.
  • Demographic: related to the structure of populations.
  • Awareness: knowledge or perception of a situation or fact.
  • Socioeconomic status: a person's economic and social position based on income, education, and occupation.
  • Accessibility: the quality of being easy to obtain or use.
  • Guidelines: a set of recommendations or advice on how something should be done.
  • Subsidy: a sum of money granted by the government to assist an industry or business.
  • Lifestyle: the way in which a person lives.
  • Public health: the health of the population as a whole, especially as monitored, regulated, and promoted by the state.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: