Your friend has been offered a place on course at the university where you studied. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Describe where you lived when you were a student at the university Recommend the best way for him/her to look for accommodation warn him/her of mistakes students make when choosing accommodation

#friend #place #course #university #student #accommodation #mistakes #students

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Dear Rahul Hope

this

letter finds you well and believe you are in good health and in high spirits. I am writing to

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

share my knowledge regarding choosing the accommodation.

Firstly

, I am very happy you are coming to my city Edmonton. I

lived

Wrong verb form

live

show examples

at 100 Street and

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

where you are coming to study is near to my house.

While

finding

room

Add an article

a room

the room

show examples

, I suggest you

Remove the particle

apply

show examples

find

Correct pronoun usage

one

show examples

near by

Correct your spelling

nearby

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

University

because you do not have a car to travel and buses are not frequently

goes

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

to the

University

. The best way

you can

Wrong verb form

is to

show examples

look at

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

website as they have

hostel

Correct article usage

a hostel

show examples

facility.

Apart from

this

, as your course duration is 3 months ,so I suggest you do not make

lease

Correct article usage

a lease

show examples

more than your course duration.

Last

but not least, without seeing any property do not give any type of advance because these days a lot of money scandal is happening. Looking forward to hearing a positive response from your side. I am happy to see you soon. with love, Navdeep

Submitted by navdeepbajaj89 on Fri Nov 15 2024

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coherence cohesion

Organize your paragraphs better to improve logical flow.

task achievement

Include more details about your own living experience for a fuller response.

task achievement

The tone is friendly and appropriate for writing to a friend.

coherence cohesion

Each paragraph focuses on a single idea.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

173 words

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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