IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today. To what extend do you agree and disagree.

#exploration #development #alternatives #fuels #priority
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Nowadays, the crisis of
energy
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 has
arised
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raised
arisen
 a huge concern among the public.
Therefore
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, some people claim that exploring safe
althernatives
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alternatives
alternative
 to fossil
fuels
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 is the most crucial priority for
society
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 today. In my opinion, I agree with
this
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 notion to a large
extend
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extent
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. Fossil
fuels
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 are at risk of depletion, so it is necessary to find
alternatives
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 to replace the need
of
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for
show examples
energy
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. As the
world
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 develops rapidly today, more
energy
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 is required
to
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for
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 every aspect of
society
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.
However
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, the fossil resources on Earth
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 limited and
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 will be depleted in
near
Correct article usage
the near
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 future.
As a result
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, people should stress
on
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apply
show examples
the exploration of finding new
alternatives
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of
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to
show examples
energy
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 to help maintain the stability of the
world
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.
For example
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, the discoveries of renewable
energies
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has
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have
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 effectively brought hope to
mankinds
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mankind
, helping
society
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 to become less dependent on fossil
fuels
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.
Moreover
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, the development of these green
energies
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 has reduced the emission of harmful gases, gradually slowing down the speed of
global-warming
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global warming
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, which preserves the sustainability of the globe.
In addition
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, without the
energy
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providing
Wrong verb form
provided
show examples
, many sectors of
society
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 would be significantly impacted.
Thus
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, the need
of
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for
show examples
 safe alternative
energies
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 is indispensable for the
world
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's
overall
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 advancement.
Although
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 there are some other vital issues
such
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 as the loss of biodiversity and the excessive garbage produced by
human
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humans
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, both of these issues require the aid of technical procedures to cope with the problems, which at the same time need to be operated by
energy
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.
Furthermore
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, numerous scientists assert that humans should be alert
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the loss of fossil
fuels
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 and focus on exploring new
alternatives
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.
Otherwise
Linking Words
, the whole
world
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 will
shot
Add a missing verb
be shot
show examples
 down
due to
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 the emptiness of
traditionl
Correct your spelling
traditional
energy
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. In conclusion, I agree with the concept that people should prioritize
on
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apply
show examples
finding new safe
alternatives
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 to fossil
fuels
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, as it is the key to
keep
Wrong verb form
keeping
show examples
 the
world
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 sustainable and stable. More importantly, without the
energy
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, other critical issues cannot be solved either.
Therefore
Linking Words
, finding alternative
energies
Use synonyms
 is now the top mission of all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human beings.
Submitted by a0979181071 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that paragraphs are separated properly to improve the logical structure. Consider using clearer topic sentences for each paragraph.
Task Achievement
While the essay includes some examples, further elaboration on examples would strengthen the essay's arguments. For instance, mention specific kinds of renewable energy such as solar or wind power and discuss their impacts.
General Language
There are some grammatical inaccuracies that need attention, particularly in pluralization and verb forms, e.g., "the fossil resources on Earth is limited" should be "the fossil resources on Earth are limited." Pay attention to subject-verb agreement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay effectively establishes an introduction and a conclusion, which reinforce the main ideas presented.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task and provides a clear stance, arguing in favor of prioritizing safe alternatives to fossil fuels.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • climate change
  • fossil fuels
  • safe alternatives
  • global priority
  • limitations
  • drawbacks
  • potential benefits
  • government
  • international cooperation
  • investing
  • research and development
  • challenges
  • obstacles
  • transitioning
  • individuals
  • businesses
  • adopting
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