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Band 5

Some claim that it is compulsory for professionals to work in their original country while others believe that they should have a right to work abroad.This essay will discuss both views and provide my own perspective on the matter.

#professionals #work #country #right #perspective #matter
Some
people
 think that individuals who are
professionals
 in their field
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should serve their
country
,
while
 others say that they should have the option of pursuing their talents abroad. In
this
 essay, I want to explain both ideas and
state
 my opinion. First of all, it should be noted that
people
 who study in their
country
 and are
professionals
 in their field can create many positive effects by working in their
country
. So,
this
 can lead to development in many parts of the
country
.
For example
, it can contribute to the economic side of the
country
, training
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
new specialists,
promoting
Correct word choice
and promoting
show examples
 the
country
 abroad.
In addition
, these
people
 can become a source of motivation and an example for the new generation.
On the other hand
,
On the other hand
, chances should be created for
professionals
 to promote their
country
 by working abroad.
Also
, the work of
professionals
 abroad can lead to the creation of cooperation at the international level,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 study of new experiences. İn my opinion, each person's opinion and choice should be respected. forcing
people
 is disrespectful to them.
Also
, supporting
people
 who want to work abroad can be useful for the
state
 in certain aspects.
To
Change preposition
In
show examples
conculucion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, forcing experts to work in their own countries can create a sense of coercion against their personal opinions. So, working abroad should be supported by the
state
 in order to create more useful international relations for
this
state
.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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language
Make sure to maintain a consistent level of formal register throughout the essay. The use of 'might,' 'could,' or 'can' adds speculation that isn't necessary in all instances.
coherence cohesion
Clarify the transitions between arguments or points. While 'On the other hand' is used effectively, introducing contrasting ideas with varied phrases can enhance readability.
task achievement
Clear stance stated with personal opinion included in the essay.
task achievement
Both perspectives were adequately addressed, which adds depth to the analysis.
coherence cohesion
The author used a balanced approach to discussing the two viewpoints, without overly favoring one side.
coherence cohesion
Well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compulsory
  • right to work
  • original country
  • work abroad
  • national development
  • local economy
  • give back
  • personal growth
  • methodologies
  • knowledge sharing
  • global collaboration
  • moral argument
  • freedom of choice
  • infringe
  • personal freedoms
  • informal ambassadors
  • international relations
  • networks
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