Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is it a negative or positive development? Give your explanation using some relevant examples from your experience.

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Putting extra
pressure
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on
children
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to achieve success has become a vital topic of debate.
While
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some
parents
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encourage
children
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in accurate measures to become
successfull
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successful
, others put excessive
pressure
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on their
children
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to achieve their goals and ambitions.
Although
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there are various reasons
such
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as a
fauiler
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failure
personal experience .I strongly believe that
this
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trend can gradually
result
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in harmful consequences
such
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as a
depresion
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depressed
feeling, which will be discussed.
Firstly
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, feeling a sense of success and fulfilment among individuals, particularly the younger generation can offer various benefits
such
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as happier
societies
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.
Therefore
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both
parents
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and
societies
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frequently
exsert
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exert
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encountless
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countless
pressure
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on
children
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to
becoming
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become
show examples
successful as
a
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apply
show examples
mature.
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Additionally
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Additionally,
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if
parents
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struggle to achieve their goals in their personal lives, they might put extra
pressure
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on their
children
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rather than encourage them in accurate strategies, to follow their personal
ambititions
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ambitions
. A prime illustration is a mother who has always
a
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apply
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dream
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dreamed
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of being a doctor.
As a
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result
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, these
parents
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make an effort to
equipe
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equip
children
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with extra
pressure
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such
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as
a
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apply
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numerous different educational
curriculum
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curricula
show examples
for becoming successful in
the
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apply
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futher
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further
future
education.
On the other hand
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,
this
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approach can significantly contribute to harmful effects for both
societies
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and
children
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.
Thus
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, putting extra
pressure
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on
children
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not only can lead to unhappier and
unsuistainable
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unsustainable
sustainable
societies
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but
also
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can decrease a sense of
confident
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confidence
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among
children
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.
As a
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result
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, these
children
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as young
adaults
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adults
are likely to challenge with various emotional problems
such
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as stress and
depresion
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depression
in the future.
For instance
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, consider a student who is
overwelmed
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overwhelmed
with his extra
curriculem
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curriculum
curricular
program and does not have
enought
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enough
free time to play like other pers, So
This
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child might encounter
with
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apply
show examples
various emotional challenges
such
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as feeling
abandence
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abundance
abandoned
and
isolation
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isolated
show examples
. In conclusion,
Although
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a significant number of
parents
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are interested in putting extra
pressure
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on their
children
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,
due to
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various reasons including their personal
fauiler
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family
failure
experiences,
this
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trend can
result
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in negative consequences
such
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as
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
increase in feeling
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of depresion
show examples
depresion
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depression
and distress among
children
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.
Submitted by mahanz on

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coherence cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of your arguments. For instance, make sure each sentence logically follows from the previous one to make your argument easier to follow.
task achievement
Avoid small grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and spelling. These can distract readers from your arguments.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to reinforce your points. This strengthens your arguments and helps clarify your ideas.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay is clear, with a good introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have addressed the task effectively and offered a reasonable stance supported by examples.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • prosperous future
  • highly competitive
  • extracurricular activities
  • social comparison
  • compelled
  • societal judgement
  • instill discipline
  • work ethic
  • responsibility
  • anxiety
  • diminished self-esteem
  • loss of interest
  • alienated
  • strained relationships
  • rebel
  • burnout
  • hinder
  • well-being
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