Nowadays a large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned be¬cause of the negative effects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Advertising is one of the strategies in marketing aimed to up the selling,

Linking Words

however

Add the comma(s)

however,

show examples

advertised

Replace the word

advertising

show examples

children

Use synonyms

is a contentious debate in

this

Linking Words

day,

due to

Linking Words

bring

numerious

Correct your spelling

numerous

drawbacks

Change preposition

for

show examples

children

Use synonyms

, I personally firmly agree that

advertise

Wrong verb form

advertising

show examples

adressed

Correct your spelling

aimed

children

Use synonyms

should be banned.

To begin

Linking Words

with, advertising

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

numerious

Correct your spelling

numerous

advantages to influence

consumer

Fix the agreement mistake

consumers

show examples

or to inform

Use synonyms

customer

Fix the agreement mistake

customers

show examples

about

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

certain products,

new

Correct word choice

or new

show examples

features, or just inform

discount

Fix the agreement mistake

discounts

show examples

or other information to their

customer

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

Use synonyms

obiously

Correct your spelling

obviously

bring

Change the verb form

brings

show examples

the positive impacts for both factory and

customer

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, Jabra store

launching

Wrong verb form

launched

show examples

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

design of TWS which has a new feature to proof water, so

marketing

Correct article usage

the marketing

show examples

agency

trying

Wrong verb form

tried

show examples

to introduce their new product through

bilboard

Correct your spelling

board

Use synonyms

, by

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

Use synonyms

customer

Fix the agreement mistake

customers

show examples

informed

Add a missing verb

were informed

show examples

and have a good information enough to make a decision to buy

new

Add an article

a new

the new

show examples

product.

However

Linking Words

some

Change preposition

apply

show examples

marketing

agency

Fix the agreement mistake

agencies

show examples

adressed

Correct your spelling

addressed

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

ads

Use synonyms

children

Use synonyms

influenced

Correct word choice

and influenced

show examples

them to a certain products using

children

Use synonyms

as their models,

Linking Words

this type

Fix the agreement mistake

These types

show examples

ads

Use synonyms

gain

Wrong verb form

gained

show examples

some

critics

Fix the agreement mistake

criticism

show examples

and responses from society suspected

have

Add the particle

to have

show examples

some negative impacts.

For instance

Linking Words

, fast

food

Use synonyms

Fix the agreement mistake

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

vulnerability
impressionability
developmental stage
critical thinking
marketing tactics
dietary choices
childhood obesity
materialism
consumerism
parental control
consumption
advertising literacy
interpret
outright ban
economic repercussions
media outlets
ad revenue

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
More and more businesses as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face.
Nowadays, Societies prefer having conversations whether for work or for personal relationships indirectly using their gadgets. Firstly, I will discuss the benefits of that communication. Secondly, I will explain the problem caused by overusing technology in conversations.
5
band
Some people believe that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others believe that they should start school at a later age. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Whether children should start their education at a very early period of their life or later is become a debateable issue . Both the views will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs along with my opinion .
5
band
Some people believe that the government should provide financial assistance to artists (such as painters and musicians) to encourage the development of arts, while others argue that this is a waste of money that could be better spent elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In these modern days, arts have become a crucial part in everyone's life, especially in the entertainment industry. There is an ongoing debate whether government should spend more money to encourage the development of art or elsewhere. Some people believe that it is beneficial to provide financial support to artists, such as painters, musicians and film-makers, while I partly agree with this view.
6
band
Some people think that the parents of children who commit crime should also receive a punishment. Do you agree or disagree?
In the contemporary world, juvenile crime plays such a crucial part in our lives. It is asserted that if people who are in their teenage years are guilty of the breach, their parents will also have to be given a penalty. I wholeheartedly agree with this statement, and I will explain why in this essay.
6.5
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
In many nations, people prefer to purchase abodes instead of paying lease fees to the landlord. This way of preference has numerous potential reasons. Personally, I am convinced that this can bring about so many merits.

Nowadays a large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned be¬cause of the negative effects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

More and more businesses as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face.

Some people believe that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others believe that they should start school at a later age. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that the government should provide financial assistance to artists (such as painters and musicians) to encourage the development of arts, while others argue that this is a waste of money that could be better spent elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the parents of children who commit crime should also receive a punishment. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?