People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

It is often argued how we should distribute our earnings; some people believe earnings should not be imposed by
taxes
,
while
some people argue that
taxes
are important in the redistribution of society's resources.
However
, I assume that
taxes
are very important for the
state
's prosperity and well-being.
Firstly
, economic situations vary by country, which makes it difficult to evaluate the importance of
taxes
. Some countries have adopted socio-oriented economies,
while
some prefer capitalistic opportunities. Regardless of the system, in today's world,
taxes
are a unique instrument for governments to collect
money
and allocate it
further
to the development of the country.
For example
, business entities function and get profits, after which they are obliged to pay
taxes
. These
taxes
are
then
directed to the
state
budget, which makes
further
decisions on what spheres to address efficiently and make a long-term impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
society's well-being.
Furthermore
, the
money
from
taxes
is vital for the security and safety of the
state
. It is difficult to imagine life without law-enforcement authorities and
state
defense
Change the spelling
defence
show examples
. Being government institutions and fully dependent on
state
money
, these organizations exist
due to
the
money
of taxpayers.
Moreover
, policymaking institutions are
also
dependent on
state
money
, but no tax system can hugely affect their decision-making process, which makes it harder to assess and allocate resources. In the long term,
this
has a
deteriorative
Correct word choice
detrimental
show examples
impact on the
state
and society.
To sum up
, I believe that
taxes
are a very important component of countries' economies, which help them to allocate resources and make long-term perspective plans based on their input from the tax system.
Submitted by Mido  on

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task response
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Citing real-world examples or studies can strengthen your argument about the importance of taxes.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly ties back to the main argument and flows smoothly. You may benefit from using more linking words to connect your ideas and paragraphs.
task response
The essay presents a clear stance on the importance of taxes and organizes arguments logically with a strong introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a good structure, with distinct paragraphs and a logical flow that supports the reader’s understanding.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
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