IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decided to do this.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times gap years had a significant impact on people's lives. It is a highly debatable issue whether there are many benefits to
students
Use synonyms
 to work or travel before starting university, or whether it has drawbacks to pupils. From my perspective, I believe that the beneficial effects of taking one
year
Use synonyms
 overpower the detrimental ones.
This
Linking Words
 essay will outline the merits and demerits followed by my opinion.  On the one hand, there are a few frequent disadvantages to a gap
year
Use synonyms
.
first,
Linking Words
It has been linked to many mental health issues. People could suffer from stress and anxiety
due to
Linking Words
 the leisure time. A good example here is my friend Fatma who complained about the long time she spent when she was waiting for the University. So, it increased the pressure and depression.
Second,
Linking Words
without working or studying,
students
Use synonyms
 can do many bad things. They can commit some crimes
such
Linking Words
 as theft to get
money
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are many advantages to taking a
year
Use synonyms
 between finishing high school and starting University studies plays a vital role in investing
money
Use synonyms
.
Students
Use synonyms
 will have a chance to work as a part-time.
For example
Linking Words
, there are various jobs like working in restaurants, shops or any simple tasks to gain some
money
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, it promotes financial purposes that help the
students
Use synonyms
 to complete their studies. Another advantage to be considered is that if individuals have enough time to think about their suitable careers, potentially they may work more efficiently.
Thus
Linking Words
, it contributes to an increased sense of satisfaction. In conclusion, a gap
year
Use synonyms
 is an essential step for
students
Use synonyms
. I agree that the advantages of
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon are outweigh the disadvantages. Gaining
money
Use synonyms
 and increasing health benefits are the major causes.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the idea of studying immediately after school should be stopped. The governments have a priority to encourage people to have a rest before studying.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Expand further on specific disadvantages and benefits with concrete examples to enhance illustration.
clear comprehensive ideas
Maintain neutral language to remain unbiased when presenting both pros and cons.
introduction conclusion present
The essay begins with a clear introduction that sets the context and outlines the writer's opinion effectively.
complete response
The writer provides a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, making the analysis comprehensive.
logical structure
Well-structured paragraphing and use of cohesive devices to connect ideas clearly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
What to do next:
Look at other essays: