Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people,while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In these modern days in many cities around the world, one of the places which is the most visited is a museum, because in

this

Linking Words

space the

people

Use synonyms

from any country could learn about many subjects,

such

Linking Words

as history or social culture.

Whereas

Linking Words

, education is not the only purpose of museums, but

also

Linking Words

these areas are created to entertain

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

individuals.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the reasons why museums exist for

educating

Replace the word

education

show examples

and

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

entertaining

Replace the word

entertainment

show examples

Firstly

Linking Words

, the first objective of a museum is to give the population ways to educate.

Therefore

Linking Words

, in that

institution

Add a comma

institution,

show examples

people

Use synonyms

can find skills for improving any specific subject, in many cases about art, the study of the past, or biology. A good example of

that is

Linking Words

the Natural History Museum of London, which is a place where adults and

childs

Correct your spelling

children

show examples

can learn about animals and geology.

Correct your spelling

show examples

for mention,

this

Linking Words

type of

institut

Correct your spelling

institute

exists for education.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, another objective of the exhibition is entertaining.

Hence

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are learning, they can enjoy moments: playing or watching videos about biology over time.

For instance

Linking Words

, in Explora

park

Capitalize word

Park

show examples

Medellin

Add a comma

Medellin,

show examples

the visitor might improve their knowledge about the functions of the body,

while

Linking Words

they are playing interaction games. For that reason, exhibition rooms aim to be entertaining.

To sum up

Linking Words

expositions

Correct your spelling

exhibitions

show examples

are made for many purposes, one of them is giving learning- skills to individuals, and the second one is allowing

people

Use synonyms

to enjoy the exhibitions with games, because visitors might learn

while

Linking Words

they are playing.

mariajoser3Tue Nov 19 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph clearly relates to the central topic and avoids veering off into tangents.

Coherence and Cohesion

Enhance the introduction to more clearly outline the discussion of both views.

Task Achievement

Provide more specific examples and details to strengthen the arguments presented.

Task Achievement

Improve the clarity of some complex sentences by breaking them into simpler ones.

Task Achievement

The essay clearly discusses both views on the purpose of museums, balancing them well.

Coherence and Cohesion

The structure of the essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Task Achievement

There are specific examples, such as the mention of the Natural History Museum of London and Explora park, which enhance the response.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ideas flow smoothly from one paragraph to the next, aiding readability and understanding.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familier with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your opinion.
Some people prefer to spend their time on new things that they have never done. And other people like to allocate their time to regular things. Both of these ideas have advantages and disadvantages, but I would rather choose the second idea because its simplicity and regularity.
7.5
band
Some people think that the government should invest more in public health and less in other areas such as education and infrastructure. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is a contentious issue whether governments should allocate more finances to the public health sector than study and development. I partially agree with this unequal investment because no matter health is an important factor for the growth of nations, balanced financial aid is essential for other sectors too. This essay will delve deeper into these points in the impending paragraphs.
4
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
population of elderly increase from younger generation in recent years.some people believes that this issue the number of young adults employed in society causes an improved nation compared to the old employed people in the countries, while some other ideas are the experience of old people should be used for improving the community.
<4
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other s think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own oipinion.
There is no doubt that advertising plays an effective role in the whole world in these days. Nevertheless, some people are against that, due to the fact that no one are paying attention to it. In my opinion, it seems to me that it really helps to persuade people to buy the thing.
6.5
band
How does Fitzpatrick demonstrate that a poem is a site of confrontations?
Jameson Fitzpatrick demonstrates that a poem is a site of confrontations by using repetition, anaphora, and contrast in the poem “I Woke Up,” to examine how everyday aspects of their life, especially race, gender, and sexual identity, are influenced by politics and encourage the audience to think about the political influences in their lives.

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people,while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familier with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your opinion.

Some people think that the government should invest more in public health and less in other areas such as education and infrastructure. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other s think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own oipinion.

How does Fitzpatrick demonstrate that a poem is a site of confrontations?