some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

THERE IS AN ONGOING DEBATE ABOUT THE ADVERTISING, SOME
PEOPLE
ARE OF THE OPINION THAT MARKETING IS SUCCESSFUL AT PERSUADING
PEOPLE
TO PURCHASE THINGS,
WHILE
OTHERS BELIEVE THAT IT IS COMMON, AND DOES NOT ATTRACT ATTENTION AS BEFORE.
THIS
ESSAY WILL BE DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS, WITH MY SUPPORT OF FORMER. MANY
PEOPLE
HOLD THE VIEW THAT MARKETING MAY NOT
ATTRACTS
Change the verb form
ATTRACT
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ENOUGH ATTENTION
DUE TO
INTERNET
Correct article usage
THE INTERNET
show examples
.
PEOPLE
HAVE ACCESS TO SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS AND
INTERNET
Correct article usage
THE INTERNET
show examples
, SO VIA
INTERNET
Correct article usage
THE INTERNET
show examples
THEY ARE EASILY INFORMED ABOUT
PRODUCTS
, RATHER THAN BILLBOARDS, TV AND FLYERS. MOST OF
TIME
Correct pronoun usage
THEIR TIME
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IS SPENT BY
PEOPLE
ON THE
INTERNET
,SO THEY CAN REACH POTENTIAL CUSTOMERS.
SUCH
AS, SOME KIND OF COSMETIC
PRODUCTS
ARE SHOWN
BY
Change preposition
THROUGH
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ONLINE ADVERTISING .
ON THE OTHER HAND
,
WHICH
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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I SUPPORT, ADVOCATES THAT
PEOPLE
'S PERSUADING BY MARKETING WORKS SUCCESSFULLY. CORPORATIONS SUCCESSFULLY
DETERMINED
Wrong verb form
DETERMINE
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,
TARGET
Correct word choice
AND TARGET
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CUSTOMERS'
AREA
Fix the agreement mistake
AREAS
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OF
INTERES
Correct your spelling
INTEREST
,
THUS
IT
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
ENHANCING
TO RAISE
Verb problem
apply
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BRAND AWARENESS. APART FROM THAT, EVEN IF INDIVIDUALS DO NOT NEED ANY
PRODUCTS
, THEY WOULD BE SWAY BY ADVERTISING. CERTAIN
PRODUCTS
' ADVERTISING WORKS BOTH
INTERNET
AND BROADCAST PROPAGANDA, AS
PEOPLE
ARE IN DIRE NEED OF THEM. SKINCARE
PRODUCTS
, ELECTRONICAL GADGETS AND FOOD ARE CLEAR EXAMPLES OF THEM.
TO CONCLUDE
, ADVERTISING STRATEGIES WORK WELL FOR PERSUADING INDIVIDUALS. I HOPE
PEOPLE
ONLY BUY USEFUL THINGS.
Submitted by afaaslanova07 on

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Language Use
Work on diversifying the vocabulary and using less common phrases, rather than repeating similar words or phrases.
Task Achievement
Make sure to provide more detailed examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. This can help clarify your points and make the essay more convincing.
Language Use
Try to improve sentence variety and complexity, as most of the sentences are quite similar in structure.
Introduction
The introduction clearly outlines the main views and states the writer's position, which is very important in establishing focus for the essay.
Coherence
Each paragraph has a clear central topic, aligning with the essay question.
Conclusion
The essay ends with a clear conclusion that summarizes the writer's view.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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