IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Every country has poor people and every country has different ways of dealing with the poor. What are some of the reasons for world poverty? How can the poor be helped? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#country #people #world #poverty #answers
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The cause and solution of
poverty
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 in many
countries
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 has been a vital topic of debate.
While
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 there are various reasons related to
poverty
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, the most significant one is
unavailable
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the availability of
show examples
 a variety of
job
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opportunities
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.
As a result
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, governments and authorities should make an effort to implement practical laws toward reducing
poverty
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 in communications including increasing
job
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opportunities
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. First of all, the rate of
poverty
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 has increased dramatically over the years,
particularlly
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particularly
 among developing
countries
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, where the
birthrate
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birth rate
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 is extremely higher compared to that in developed
countries
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.
However
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, the growing population has led to detrimental consequences, the most vital reason can be considered as
less
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fewer
show examples
job
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opportunities
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, So many individuals, particularly the younger generation have struggled to
take
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make
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 a career. A prime illustration of
this
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 is India, where
due to
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numerous
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the large
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 population, many young people find it difficult to meet their needs.
On the other hand
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, there are various solutions available
toward
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for
show examples
this
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 challenge.
For instance
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, if developed companies
such
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 as Apple decided to invest in developing
countries
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,
this
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 trend not only
offers
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offer
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 various
job
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opportunities
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 but
can
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could
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also
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 lead to numerous benefits for both societies and individuals
such
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 as developing and improving
the
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apply
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communications.
Moreover
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, developed
countries
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 can play a crucial role
to reduce
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in reducing
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poverty
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 in developing
countries
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,
Therefore
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, many charities can
transfor
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transfer
transform
 stream amounts of money to these underprivileged societies. In conclusion, it is highlighted that,
althoght
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although
 there are compelling reasons for
poverty
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 in societies
such
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 as unavailable
job
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opportunities
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 ,governments and
authuruties
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authorities
 in developed
countries
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 can bring effective solutions to these poor communications.
Submitted by mahanz on

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coherence cohesion
Try to clarify your ideas more clearly by structuring each paragraph around a single main idea with supporting details.
task achievement
Develop your examples more thoroughly and align them directly with the topic sentence of each paragraph for better task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Use transition words to improve the logical flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing the main points effectively.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples which relate to the issues and possible solutions of poverty.
task achievement
You address both parts of the task, discussing reasons for poverty and potential solutions.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • historical factors
  • colonialism
  • wealth accumulation
  • poor governance
  • corruption
  • critical areas
  • entrenching poverty
  • quality education
  • unfair trade practices
  • natural disasters
  • climate change
  • disaster recovery
  • adaptation
  • microfinancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • economic self-sufficiency
  • social safety nets
  • unemployment benefits
  • food assistance
  • affordable healthcare
  • fair trade practices
  • financial stability
  • international aid
  • development projects
  • uplift
  • underprivileged communities
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