Today in many countries in order to find work people have to move away from their friends and family. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In recent years, many citizens have migrated from their hometowns to the capital city, expecting to find better professional opportunities.

This

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has sparked an ongoing debate about whether

this

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situation's merit outweighs the drawbacks. From my perspective, whether relocation provides people with more advantages or disadvantages depends on the individual’s circumstances. On the one hand, living in a metropolitan area offers both personal and professional opportunities. Young workers who aspire to succeed in their fields have to move to the capital city where better companies and offices are based. Individuals appointed for job positions in a suitable workplace are allowed to have networks with experts in their areas, climb the career ladder and earn a significant income to support their families.

For instance

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, only limited hospitals have the capability to employ some specialist doctors

such

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as cardiothoracic surgeons or neurosurgeons and all of these hospitals only are located in major cities.

On the other hand

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, some people indicate that living in rural areas has better slow-paced lifestyles with a stronger emotional connection to your family.

Additionally

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this

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connection with loved ones creates immense happiness that cannot be replaced by financial success.

For example

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while

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some successful business owners tend to lack emotional support resulting in mental issues

such

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as depression or anxiety, others who choose to live in the countryside might not gain much accomplishment but have better mental well-being. In conclusion, the decision of whether to live in an urban or rural area relies on an individual’s priorities. Both places have their benefits and drawbacks which cannot be compared with each other.

Whereas

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the city lifestyle contributes to a successful career, rural living provides a family bond.

Thus

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, the choice ultimately depends on personal values.

chawanat.plaFri Nov 22 2024

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task achievement

To elevate task achievement, define your perspective about whether the advantages truly outweigh the disadvantages more explicitly and stick with it throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Enhance coherence by linking paragraphs more fluently and maintaining consistent logical progression.

task achievement

Although examples are relevant and specific, expanding on the consequences of living in metropolitan versus rural areas can strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Include more cohesive devices between sentences and paragraphs, like "however," "for instance," and "on the contrary," to subtly guide readers through your line of thought.

task achievement

The essay provides a balanced view, considering both benefits and drawbacks of relocating for work, showing good comprehensive ideas.

coherence cohesion

The introduction effectively sets the stage for discussion, presenting the central issue clearly.

coherence cohesion

Conclusion summarizes the main points well and states the writer's stance, contributing to a coherent finish.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Today in many countries in order to find work people have to move away from their friends and family. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It must be a woman who stays at home to care for children. Men are not suited to this kind of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Labour-saving devices such as dishwashers and communication tools such as computers are supposed to make our lives easier. However, some people argue that these devices only make them more difficult. Does modern technology reduce or increase stress?

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels continue to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this, and what are some possible solutions?