Some people think that the best wat to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative wats or reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some individuals believe that the best way to mitigate
crime
is by giving longer
prison
sentences
,
while
others believe that there are better alternative ways to reduce
crime
. I personally believe that
while
other alternative ways help to
change
the
behaviours
of
prisoners
, longer
prison
sentences
are more effective because they help
prisoners
to regret
for
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
their
deeds
. Longer
prison
sentences
help
prisoners
to repent for their crimes. If
prison
sentences
are long,
criminals
have enough time to regret
for
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
their
deeds
. They realize that what they have done is wrong, and they have to face the consequences.
As a result
, they will not engage in that
crime
again when they will be released from
prison
.
For example
, in Australia,
criminals
are given
prison
sentences
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
up to 20 years depending on the severity of their
crimez
Correct your spelling
crimes
crime
. It reminds them about their
crime
every day in
prison
, and they think twice before engaging in the same
crime
after their release.
Therefore
, I personally believe that
prison
sentences
are the best way to reduce
crime
.
However
, other alternative ways to reduce
crime
help
criminals
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
change
their
behaviours
. In correctional services, there are several
programs
for
criminals
aiming
for changing
Change preposition
to change
show examples
their
behaviours
, motifs, perspectives and thoughts, which work against the
crime
. These specialized
programs
address the root causes and
behaviours
against the
crime
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and directly address them.
For instance
, in Japan,
criminals
, who are accused of homicide attend some behaviour
change
programs
as a part of their punishment, which find the reasons for their
deeds
and try to correct them.
However
, I personally believe that these
programs
do not help
criminals
to repent for their crimes. In conclusion, I personally believe that
although
behaviour
change
programs
help to address the motifs and
behaviours
against the
crime
,
prison
sentences
are more helpful in reducing the
crime
rate because they let
prisoners
repent for their
deeds
and encourage
not
Correct pronoun usage
them not
show examples
to engage in
crime
again.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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task response
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by examples, to improve clarity and understanding. For instance, when discussing long prison sentences, further examples could be added to illustrate their preventive effect on crime.
coherence cohesion
In this essay, minor errors such as spelling mistakes ('wat' and 'crimes') should be corrected to maintain professionalism and readability.
task response
Consider addressing potential counterarguments to further strengthen your position. This can give more depth to your essay, showing critical engagement with the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively present and summarize the discussed views.
task response
You have successfully discussed both viewpoints, as the prompt requests, giving a balanced view of the topic.
task response
You've provided relevant examples to support your arguments, such as the 20-year sentences in Australia and behavior change programs in Japan.

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