IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

News editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported? Discuss. (Cambridge IELTS 1).

#news #editors #broadcast #television #print #newspapers #factors #influence #decisions #cambridge #ielts
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Most of us rely
companies
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on companies
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 that have broadcasts on
tv
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TV
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 and newspapers to know what is happening in the world. Since we rely on these companies and their editors to show us
truthfull
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truthful
truthfully
news
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, we need to understand what
infuences
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influences
 them. Unless we might become used to fake
news
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 and
not
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do not
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advicate
Correct your spelling
advocate
 for good journalism. There are many factors that affect what
news
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 editors choose to show the public. A big one is the
editors
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editor's
editors'
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 personal beliefs which might not
allign
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align
 with the public opinion. Another factor is the
companies
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company's
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 bottom line and
their
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its
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 ability to make money. A company answers to its owners and they hold sway over what it says.
Alot
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A lot
 of people nowadays use social media to get their
news
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, and not a small amount of times social media gets things wrong.
This
Linking Words
 has extended to official
news
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 too, and I believe we
became
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have become
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 used to it with
excuse
Add an article
the excuse
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 of the
news
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 faster delivery. It would be better if we as a people held the agencies accountable for their
news
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 coverage. A focus on the authenticity of
news
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 is more important than the speed of its delivery.
To conclude
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, there are
alot
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a lot
factors
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of factors
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 that affect those who share the
news
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 with us and we should keep that in mind.
In addition
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 to that we have a
responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 to make sure those people know those factors and that they are working on mitigating them. The
news
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 should be factual and any opinions should be presented as
such
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.
Submitted by superalialhaddad on

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with relevant examples that support your main points. For instance, if you talk about the impact of editors' personal beliefs, you could provide an example of a situation where this played a significant role.
task achievement
Make sure the ideas are fully developed to showcase a complete and comprehensive response to the prompt. Currently, some points are only briefly mentioned without further exploration.
coherence cohesion
Consider using linking words more frequently to improve the logical flow between your sentences and paragraphs. This will help make your argument easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and is well-developed. This will enhance the clarity and logical structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets up the topic and outlines the key issues you'll address, which provides a strong start to your essay.
coherence cohesion
You conclude the essay by summarizing key points and reinforcing your argument about the importance of factual and responsible news coverage.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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