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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#households #income #summerise #information #features #comparisons
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The given graph illustrates the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and its present plan.
Overall
Linking Words
, the central library has removed all its items for 20 years, with the exception of the entrance and
adult
Use synonyms
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the entrance remained unchanged,
while
Linking Words
 the
adult
Use synonyms
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
 section relocated to a new location within the library. It is clearly seen that the children’s
books
Use synonyms
 were replaced by the lecture room on the top right-hand side.
Adult
Use synonyms
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
, which had previously occupied the middle-right side 20 years ago, supplanted the
adult
Use synonyms
 non-
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
 section, and an information desk and self-service machines took their place.
However
Linking Words
, the enquiry desk, which handled tickets and book returns, was replaced with a café on the down-right border. The bottom part of the entrance remained unaltered. It is obvious that the reading room (newspaper and magazine) was replaced by a computer room on the left downside.
Next,
Linking Words
they removed the
adult
Use synonyms
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
 section and positioned all reference
books
Use synonyms
 on the middle left border.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the CDs, videos, and computer games were removed, and sofas, storytelling events, and children’s
fiction
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
 were placed on the right side.
Submitted by mkhdermani on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words adult, fiction, books with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • household
  • income distribution
  • income brackets
  • annual income
  • significant growth
  • decline
  • comparative analysis
  • trends
  • disparity
  • shift
  • socio-economic factors
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