Some people prefer full-time jobs because they offer stability. Other people prefer casual jobs because of the freedom they offer discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Full-time
jobs
are often proposed as a way to achieve
stability
.
While
some believe that
this
approach would be effective, others tend to do part-time
jobs
, claiming that these types preserve time and offer them freedom. In my opinion,
although
full-time
jobs
contribute to
stability
and ensure a successful future, having some time for ourselves and space for our private
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
is crucial, which can be achieved by casual
jobs
. On the one hand, full-time
jobs
play a significant role in building a bright future and ensuring financial
stability
.
For instance
, doctors and architectures who work around eight hours per day gain high salaries, which leads to financial
stability
that allows them to fulfil their families' needs
such
as paying tuition fees for their children’s education or travelling to various places during summer vacations,
whereas
part-time clerks might not be capable to hold same responsibilities. Others prefer doing casual
jobs
, assuming that the financial situation is the only minimal factor of several factors that create happiness . They tend to work only four hours per day and spend the rest of their time, focusing on themselves, like chilling by staying at home with their families or even meditating.
Additionally
, they believe that part-time occupations not only offer freedom but
also
maintain good mental health by reducing stress and depression. In conclusion, it’s undeniable that full-time
jobs
have a huge role in the
stability
, particularly, the financial part of it. I believe that casual
jobs
are more flexible and contribute to the improvement of our mental health by offering more space and freedom.
Submitted by shermadovs on

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task achievement
While the essay discusses both views of the topic, it would benefit from more specific examples or data to strengthen your argumentation. Including examples from real-life situations, research, or statistics can provide a more solid backing to your claims.
coherence cohesion
The essay follows a clear structure and develops logically. However, ensure each paragraph is linked smoothly to the next with transitional statements to enhance the flow of ideas.
task achievement
You have successfully provided a clear introduction to the topic and adequately presented your opinion in the conclusion, meeting the task's requirements.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, with ideas presented in a coherent manner that makes it easy for the reader to understand your line of reasoning.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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