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Writing Samples
Band 8

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people Why might be the case Do you think this is a positive or negative situation

#countries #home #people #case #situation
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People
Use synonyms
 have their preferences in choosing a way to settle in, either by buying a house or renting.
In particular
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 countries, they are aware of the importance of owning a home rather than renting it.
This
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 is because they want to avoid strict rules or future casualties, which will lead to positive outcomes, especially in reducing homeless
people
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. Most residents simply aim for freedom by owning a house where they do not have to abide by strict rules from the host, which does not restrict them modify or alter the initial parts of it.
Additionally
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, they
also
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 do not want to experience a fluctuating price that relatively tends to ascend rather than decrease.
For instance
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, a building manager throws a rage at a man who tries to decorate the walls with paintings because he wants to preserve it basic.
Thus
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, he charges him a higher fee to compensate for his actions, which makes him leave the place and seek his own building where he can do everything without limitations.
Furthermore
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, owning a house will impact the owner positively because of the reduced possibility of being homeless. Sometimes
people
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 may deal with unexpected situations where they can not afford the rent, which eventually forces them to leave the place. To exemplify, a rental that suddenly raises the fee
due to
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 some economic difficulties will make the residents feel disbelief and shocked since they have to move to other places because they cannot manage the payment. To summarize,
people
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 want to release themselves from restrictions and prevent them become homeless.
Hence
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, a situation where they can not fulfil the fee
due to
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 unstable conditions financially can be avoided because they have freed themselves from it by officially becoming an owner of their houses.
Submitted by hanalyaa29 on

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task achievement
Although the essay effectively covers both why owning a home is important and the positive aspects of this situation, further elaboration on the negative aspects could balance the argument and provide a more comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from more explicit transitions between paragraphs to enhance flow and make it easier for readers to follow the progression of ideas.
task achievement
Consider providing more varied examples that are broader or culturally specific to enrich the argument and engage the reader.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies and discusses the reasons why people prefer owning homes over renting, focusing on autonomy and financial security.
coherence cohesion
The ideas are generally clear and expressed in a logical sequence, making it easy to understand the main points and arguments.
coherence cohesion
A strong conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments and reinforces the positive aspect of home ownership discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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