It is better for college students to live far away from home than live at home with their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In
this
period of inflation
modernity
Correct word choice
and modernity
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,
college
students
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
live far away from
home
than
live
Verb problem
apply
show examples
at
home
with their
parents
. In my opinion, I strongly agree with
this
notion and my opinion will be discussed in
further
paragraphs with a suitable conclusion. Supporting my agreement to the given statement, I firmly believe that study is
more
Add an article
a more
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important role for
college
students
in their bright future.
In
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
more
students
are
live
Wrong verb form
living
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in
college
hostel
campus
Fix the agreement mistake
campuses
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to more and more
focuse
Correct your spelling
focus
focused
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
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and modern
college
Fix the agreement mistake
colleges
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
avoid
to interfere
Change the verb form
interfering
show examples
their
Change preposition
with their
show examples
parents
. Explaining some of the
another supporting points
Replace the adjective
another supporting point
other supporting points
show examples
in favour
this
Change preposition
of this
show examples
statement, it is true that
college
students
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
live far away from
home
than live at
home
with their
parents
.
As a
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
students
are more concentrated
their
Change preposition
on their
show examples
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
and managing
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
funding without their
parents
. In conclusion, It is better for
college
students
to live far away from
home
than
live
Fix the infinitive
to live
show examples
at
home
with their
parents
. I believe that
aforementioned
Correct article usage
the aforementioned
show examples
points are strongly supporting my
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
.
Submitted by bhimani_nilesh3186 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on logically structuring your essay. Each paragraph should clearly support your overall position and flow smoothly from one idea to the next.
task achievement
Clarify your ideas and arguments. Ensure that your main points are clearly presented and developed with supporting details.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. These will help strengthen your argument and show the reader concrete cases or evidence.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion in your essay, which is crucial for providing a clear structure and perspective.
task achievement
Your stance on the topic is clear, and having a strong position helps guide the reader through your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • responsibility
  • life skills
  • budgeting
  • cooking
  • time management
  • social integration
  • networking
  • extracurricular activities
  • academic resources
  • distractions
  • cultural exposure
  • personal development
  • global understanding
  • self-discovery
  • personal growth
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