Some people who have been successful in society don't attribute their success to the theoretical knowledge they learned from their university. Do you agree or disagree that theoretical knowledge is not as valuable as expected?

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Some successful in society people underestimate the importance of the theoretical knowledge they gained from their institutions.

Therefore

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, it is widely believed that it is not as appreciated as it should be. I agree with

this

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statement because nowadays, it is really hard to succeed and there is a high level of competition because of the world population.

Firstly

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, there are more than 8 billion human beings across all countries and it is challenging to develop something new. Your own success primarily depends on your own start-up skills and not on your academic qualities and abilities, simply because there were more than 2000 other graduators in the university where you have been studying and you have to compete with all of them after graduation and

that is

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just one university among thousands of them.

Therefore

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that is

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why you have to discover something unique since in today's digital age academic skills are not practically as valuable as they used to be.

For instance

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, recent research showed that the rich mainly benefited from their personal and communicative skills, rather than the ones they inherited from their university.

Moreover

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, as mentioned earlier, the world population is now more than 8 billion people and it leads to the abundance of candidates on job markets.

Additionally

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, If you are good in IT-related fields, it does not guarantee that one day you will succeed since there is an extremely huge number of individuals who are capable of doing the same.

For example

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, the overwhelming majority of dollar billionaires gained their wealth from implementing new ideas and creativity, definitely not from theoretical knowledge. In conclusion, I think that the knowledge you get in institutions is not enough to become wealthy and successful

due to

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the large number of potential workers and the ones who want to work in the same field.

This

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is why I am a firm believer that success mainly depends on personal capabilities and abilities, rather than theoretical and academic ones.

shermadovsTue Nov 26 2024

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task achievement

While your main ideas are clear, consider elaborating further on how theoretical knowledge can still serve as a foundation for practical skills. This will provide a more balanced view.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that transitions between paragraphs and ideas are smooth, as this will enhance the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Try to address potential counterarguments to strengthen your position and showcase a well-rounded understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

The introduction is engaging and sets the stage for the argument effectively.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reaffirms your position.

task achievement

You provide relevant examples that support your main points, reinforcing your arguments well.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

328 words

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Some people who have been successful in society don't attribute their success to the theoretical knowledge they learned from their university. Do you agree or disagree that theoretical knowledge is not as valuable as expected?

In many societies in the world, the population is ageing rapidly and this is leading to an unsustainable increase in the cost of public healthcare. nA ation’s population should pay for their healthcare provision in the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think one should stay all their life in the same job, whereas others advocate changing jobs from time to time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many cities, problems related to overpopulation are becoming more common. Some governments are now encouraging businesses and individuals to move out of cities to rural areas. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.