The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

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Nowadays,

science

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has played a crucial role for

humans

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in many ways,

thus

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science

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advancement is beneficial for

people

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’s

lives

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Although

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the aim of

science

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is not only for

people

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

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for living creatures including animals and plants, the usage of

science

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is inevitable for our

lives

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. Some

people

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claim that scientific

research

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should consider holistic living

lives

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For example

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, medical advancement is beneficial for

people

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to cure disease,

however

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, a mouse

for instance

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is used for drug tests when a new medicine is introduced. If

people

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conduct

research

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only for

humans

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, the ignorance of other living

lives

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would happen and it would bring damage to nature's balance.

Thus

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, scientific

research

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needs to integrate other creature’s

lives

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On the other hand

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science

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has been contributing to improving human

lives

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. Life expectancy rate has been improved drastically

recent

Change preposition

in recent

show examples

years,

this

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is because scientific

research

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on medicine, remedies and operations has improved and

thus

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humans

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can live longer than before.

Furthermore

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, many scientists think that moving to the Moon could be a solution for maintaining

people

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’s

lives

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because of the increase in population, the capability of living on the earth would be limited

therefore

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alternative way of living is required.

Research

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including gaining water and fire, cropping rice and vegetables is progressing for near the future. In conclusion, I strongly believe that

science

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is one of the most important study areas for

humans

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Although

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applying scientific

research

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should not take into account

people

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’s ego, as a whole it could bring benefits

such

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as medical advancement and the possibility of living in outer space for

people

Use synonyms

hojoeriWed Nov 27 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea. While you have addressed multiple perspectives, making the main argument stand out more prominently can enhance clarity.

task achievement

Some sentences could be more concise and focused to strengthen the argument. Try to simplify complex structures for better clarity.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively opening and closing the argument.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples, such as the use of medical advancements and space exploration, that add meaning to your points.

task achievement

The points around life expectancy and space exploration demonstrate clear, comprehensive ideas that are logically developed.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

crucial role
enhancing
quality of human life
advancements
medicine
healthcare
scientific research
solving societal problems
improving living standards
global issues
climate change
food scarcity
technological advancements
limitations
negative consequences
ethical considerations
sustainability
environmental preservation

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The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Your opinion

Some people believe that governments should make laws about people’s nutrition and food choice while others argue that it is their choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some people think that big companies should provide sports and social facilities for the local community. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that airports and bus terminals should be constructed outside the cities while others believe that these facilities should be built within the city centers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to alter our character traits. To what extent do you agree?