In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
n
our modern day and age, high school Correct your spelling
In
students
face a challenging decision after graduation Use synonyms
that is
what they should do next? Nowadays, more and more youngsters apply to technical institutions where they learn a Linking Words
career
by Use synonyms
practicing
it Change the spelling
practising
hands on
rather than seeking Add a hyphen
hands-on
a
tertiary education Remove the article
apply
in
university. I believe that both paths offer a lot to the young generation and choosing either one depends on their needs and desires.
Bachelor's Change preposition
at
degree
and higher qualifications are essential in some professions Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
such
as engineering, Linking Words
Medical- related
practices and fields of science. Correct your spelling
medical-related
Thus
, Linking Words
students
who desire to have Use synonyms
such
professions, it is expected they focus on academic subjects in school and graduate with high Linking Words
GPA
in order to apply to a highly esteemed university and build their qualifications for their dream job. Fix the agreement mistake
GPAs
For instance
, to become a medical doctor a person needs a seven-year university program Linking Words
Linking Words
then
a Correct word choice
and then
one -year
internship before becoming an independent practitioner.
Correct your spelling
one-year
However
, Linking Words
while
some Linking Words
students
favour academia and science, others find themselves in manual skills and professions Use synonyms
such
as carpentering, sewing or a Linking Words
career
in art and music which need different Use synonyms
educations
programs which are based on teaching the basic skills Change the noun form
education
while
working and producing products under supervision. Linking Words
Also
, in these programs, Linking Words
students
are able to work and have an income to support themselves Use synonyms
while
building a Linking Words
career
. Use synonyms
For example
, a friend of mine who is now a successful businesswoman, Linking Words
she
went to Correct pronoun usage
apply
cooking
academy to Correct article usage
a cooking
purse
her passion for baking and started to sell her cakes online Correct your spelling
pursue
while
she was in school.
In conclusion, choosing a Linking Words
career
path depends on the person's choice and passion. Tertiary education and work-based training are merely tools to enable young people to achieve their goals and have their dream jobs.Use synonyms
Submitted by ghadeersulami on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow between the paragraphs. While each paragraph serves its purpose, transitions could be smoother to ensure the argument flows more naturally.
Task Achievement
Expand slightly on the potential disadvantages of work-based training to offer a more balanced discussion. While you note the benefits, it's useful to acknowledge and address possible downsides as well.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, clearly outlining the topic and summarizing your position effectively.
Task Achievement
You effectively use specific examples to support your arguments, such as the example of a friend who pursued a career in baking while obtaining practical training.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...