A country becomes more interesting and develops more quickly when its population includes a mixture of nationalities and cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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It is stated that a
country
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might be intriguing and improve more quickly when its society mixes up with other
nations
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. Many individuals claim that
this
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pattern has a devastating effect on the
country
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regarding social challenges, though I mostly agree that a mixture of various cultures develops the
country
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. Admittedly, proponents of the view against multiculturalism claim that it contributes to social issues. One of the major reasons is that when different
nations
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congregate in a
country
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,
this
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leads to cultural misunderstandings or discrimination.
For example
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, eye contact is an essential communication tool in some cultures and they use always it,
while
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in other
nations
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, it is not popular and sometimes shows disrespect.
This
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, in turn, destroys the harmony among people.
Additionally
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,
this
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phenomenon might lead to a loss of national identity. In some little European countries, the native population forgets their cuisine, and traditions, since they become exposed to other customs.
Nevertheless
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, a diverse population plays a pivotal role in the development of the
country
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. One of the obvious reasons is that it can enrich the culture of the
country
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.
In other words
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, exposure to different cultures, pieces of music, and cuisines makes the
country
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more vibrant and exciting.
For instance
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, more and more tourists travel to France
due to
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its multicultural environment.
Thus
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, the flow of
travelers
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travellers
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to the
country
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leads to economic growth.
Further
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justification is that
this
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phenomenon fosters children's knowledge. Since they educate with other
nations
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, it widens their horizons, and perspectives for the world. In conclusion,
while
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a combination of various nationalities has a detrimental effect on the
country
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in terms of forgetting native traditions and cultural misunderstanding, I am of the opinion that a diverse environment not only impacts on economy of the
country
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but
also
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has educational benefits.

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples or statistics to make your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph connects smoothly to the next, enhancing the flow of the essay.
task achievement
Consider exploring more perspectives or counterarguments to demonstrate a nuanced understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a solid framework for the reader.
task achievement
Use of specific examples like France attracting tourists due to its multicultural environment effectively supports the argument.
task achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, showing a balanced approach to the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Melting pot
  • Multicultural
  • Integration
  • Harmony
  • Cultural mosaic
  • Economic prosperity
  • Cross-cultural
  • Cultural exchange
  • Innovative thinking
  • Globalized
  • Community support
  • Social cohesion
  • Cultural diversity
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Discrimination
  • Cultural landscape
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Tourism appeal
  • Educational experience
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