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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many people today have to spend long periods of time working and living away from home. Does this have more advantages or more disadvantages for the people involved? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Minimum 250 words

#people #periods #time #home
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In today’s globalized world, it is increasingly common for people to spend extended periods working and living away from home, whether for better job opportunities or career advancement.
While
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this
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 can offer some advantages, I believe the disadvantages outweigh the benefits for the individuals involved. One significant advantage is the chance for professional growth. Relocating often provides access to better-paying jobs, specialized training, or international exposure.
For example
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, professionals in industries
such
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 as technology or engineering may relocate to major business hubs like London or Dubai to work with leading companies and advance their careers.
Furthermore
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, living in a new environment can broaden one’s cultural horizons and foster personal growth by exposing individuals to diverse perspectives.
However
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, the drawbacks of living and working away from home are substantial. Emotional challenges,
such
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 as loneliness and homesickness, can negatively impact mental health. People often miss out on family milestones,
such
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 as children’s achievements or important celebrations, which can weaken family bonds over time.
For instance
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, expatriates working in another country might struggle to maintain close relationships with their loved ones
due to
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 limited communication and physical distance.
Additionally
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, adapting to a new culture and environment is not always easy. Language barriers, cultural differences, and feelings of isolation can make it difficult to integrate into the host community.
This
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, in turn, can lead to stress and reduced productivity. Over time, the lack of a strong support system can
also
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 result in burnout or a sense of dissatisfaction. In conclusion,
while
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 working and living away from home can provide career opportunities and cultural enrichment, the emotional strain and social disconnection it causes often outweigh the benefits. Striking a balance between career aspirations and personal well-being is essential for long-term happiness.
Submitted by Priyanka on

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task achievement
While your examples are relevant, expanding on personal anecdotes or specific scenarios can make the essay more engaging and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Increase the variety of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete and well-argued response to the task, addressing both the advantages and disadvantages as required.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion effectively wraps up the argument.
coherence cohesion
Main points are generally well-supported with examples that are pertinent to the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • financial stability
  • professional growth
  • cultural exposure
  • networking opportunities
  • detachment
  • emotional stress
  • mental well-being
  • homesickness
  • personal growth
  • cultural adaptation
  • career advancement
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