Technologies like AI and Robotics are automating many human jobs and helping to maximize company profits. However, this may result in a new wave of mass unemployment and the government should step in to regulate these fields. Discuss arguments for both sides and give your opinion.

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Advances in technology and automation have become a vital topic of debate.
While
some
people
believe that these kinds of technological developments can result in the increase of companies' profits, others would argue that
this
trend leads to a variety of unemployment, across the globe. Both sides of the argument highlight compelling reasons which will be discussed, followed by my own perspective.
Firstly
, in today's advanced world, many job positions are gradually taken by AI and
Robotics
.
In other words
, a significant number of workforces are replaced by AI. Despite taking some job positions,
this
approach not only brings a sense of fulfillment for companies it
also
can increase benefits dramatically.
For instance
,
although
, in the past
people
used to type their lectures by themselves, which took excessive time, nowadays, AI can contribute to individuals typing countless texts easily through personal speech.
As a result
,
this
approach can help individuals to do their tasks easily.
In contrast
, many staff and workforce have lost their jobs over the years.
Although
people
need to meet their living, replacing their occupations with AI can result in harmful consequences,
such
as an increase in poverty. Considering a man who works in a restaurant as a waiter and does not have additional skills to find a new rewarding job. If
robotics
filled his position, he would not meet his needs.
Moreover
, some occupations need human abilities
such
as decision-making and problem-solving, so
robotics
can be successful in these situations. In conclusion, there are various opinions about
robotics
and AI, which can take over many human jobs.
Although
some
people
agree with
this
approach and believe that numerous careers will be taken, others do not agree with
this
viewport. I strongly advocate the second view and believe that
although
they might take many positions, they are essential for our world.
Submitted by mahanz on

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task achievement
Ensure you address all parts of the question more directly and equally. While you covered the arguments on both sides, more depth and balance are needed to fully satisfy the task. Consider elaborating on how governments could regulate these fields, as this part seems slightly underdeveloped.
coherence and cohesion
Connectives and linking words are used but could be improved. Some ideas are not fully developed, with transitions appearing slightly abrupt. Work on using varied linking words to create smoother transitions between and within paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, providing a clear position and summarizing key points effectively. You've effectively set the stage for discussing both sides of the argument.
general language use
Good range of vocabulary and sentence structures, which effectively convey your ideas. Despite some transitions being abrupt, you generally maintain clarity throughout the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Job displacement
  • Efficiency
  • Productivity
  • Economic growth
  • Income inequality
  • Reskilling
  • Workplace safety
  • Ethical concerns
  • Oversight
  • Regulation
  • Retraining
  • Social unrest
  • Innovation
  • Technological advancement
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